Prime, I shrunk the Officers!
by Acura RSX
Summary: When one of Wheeljack's experiments blows up, the consequences take their toll on the Ark's crew. Sparklings ahead! Warnings: Slash Pairings hinted/implied.
1. Prime, I shrunk the Officers!

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Rating: G Humor.  
Pairings: Implied Prowl x Jazz, Ironhide x Ratchet, Hound x Mirage, Inferno x Red Alert, Sunstreaker x Bluestreak.  
Summary: When one of Wheeljack's experiments blows up, the consequences take their toll on the Ark's crew.

* * *

Wheeljack's inventions were infamous for two reasons. Either they could blow up and trash half of the lab in the process. Or they could blow up and cause unpredictable, secondary effects on any Autobot unfortunate enough to be around the area when the invention in question blew.

Wheeljack stared in a mixture of awe, disbelief and downright terror when the smoke of the recent blew up cleared and exposed the consequences to his optics. "Oh, sweet Primus. Someone is going to deactivate me for this."

The engineer cursed in any and all languages he could before he gathered the evidence in his arms, trying to decide if he should hide said evidence for as long as he could or if he should just get over with it and prepare to be terminated by as many Autobots as Prime could recruit for the task. And Wheeljack was certain there would be plenty of volunteers for this particular mission.

"I'm going to get slagged anyway. Might as well get over with it quickly." The engineer rushed to the command center with his incriminating cargo in his arms, thankful for now that the hallways were empty for the time being. "Hey Prime, we've got a problem!" He announced as he walked into Optimus Prime's office. Nothing in many millennia could prepare the bearer of the Autobot Matrix of Leadership for what his optics were about to see.

* * *

Jazz stared with wide optics hidden behind his trademark blue visor at the sight before him. He tried to speak several times, but all he managed was to let his mouth hang open for a little while before he closed it to try again. After several attempts he finally managed to convey his feelings and surprise in one phrase. "What the shit is that, man?!" He practically shrieked as he pointed an accusing finger towards 'that'.

The 'that' in question stared at the finger pointed at him before he reached and wrapped his mouth around the finger and suckled away at it, trying to identify what could this object be.

"That," Prime began as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Would be Prowl."

"What the pit did you do to them?!" Ratchet rocked a crying Perceptor in his arms to try to soothe him.

"I don't know!" Wheeljack was practically hiding behind Optimus' frame. "I was about to test my newest invention and then everything exploded and when the smoke dissipated they were like this!"

Scattered across the room were several Autobots, several of them holding sparklings in their arms. Sparklings that had previously been members of the Ark's crew.

"Oh, I'm going to kill that slagger!" Ironhide and Bluestreak had to struggle to keep Sunstreaker pinned to the ground while Blaster held a very amused sparkling Sideswipe on his arms.

"You an' me both." Jazz groaned heavily as he tore his finger away from the sparkling that was his mate and removed him from Prime's arms to cradle him on his own. The sparkling Prowl made a sound of distress, prompting Jazz to offer his finger back to him, sighing again as Prowl nibbled on his finger, his little door wings fluttered happily as he did.

"I'm certain Wheeljack will be able to find a way to reverse the effects, right?" Optimus looked over his shoulder to the hiding Engineer.

"Y-Yeah! I can do it, I just need time and figure out exactly how this happened..." He whispered the last part to himself.

"You better get going then." Hound groaned heavily as he rocked the now recharging sparkling Mirage in his arms, the situation wasn't just inconvenient but also dangerous. If the Decepticons got word of what had just happened it could endanger the sparklings.  
Inferno sobbed loudly as he bounced the sparkling Red Alert on his leg, streams of optic fluid flowing down his face with a large pout spread across his face plates. He said nothing, but his unhappy pouts and cries were more than enough evidence of just how distressed he was.

"Come on! Just one bite! Let me bite him just once!" Sunstreaker kept struggling.

"Let him go, Sunny. We need him complete if you wanna see Sideswipe back to normal any time soon." Blaster chuckled softly and bounced the red sparkling on his arms, dangling a finger around for him to play with.

"The upcoming days are going to be quite testing." Optimus Prime had no idea how prophetic those words would be.

Authoer's notes: This is pure, total and absolute crack, please treat it as such.


	2. Welcome to the Kinder

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers!  
Chapter: 02 - Welcome to the Kinder.  
Notes: Follow up for the crack! More to come, oh yes! Thanks to my beta nkfloofiepoof!

* * *

"They're going to kill me." Wheeljack rubbed his face in frustration. "They're going to dismember me limb by limb and turn me into a toaster. Heck, I'll be lucky if they make me into a toaster."

"Calm down," Trailbreaker patted the engineer's shoulder. He had been appointed as bodyguard - and security measure in case anything else blew up in that lab - for Wheeljack. Optimus Prime didn't trust Bluestreak would be enough to keep Sunstreaker's rage in check.

"This is so frustrating! I finally figured out what caused the explosion, but I still don't know how they turned into sparklings." Wheeljack threw his arms up in the air. "I don't know how long it's going to take me to get this sorted out."

"Well, things have been pretty calm in the Decepticon front for now. And, thankfully, it's just five of us and not half of the Ark." Trailbreaker tried his best to offer a positive outlook.

"Yeah but one of them happens to be our strategist! Well, if any, Jazz will have to put those improvisation skills of his to good work. I think I'm going to get some energon." Wheeljack left the laboratory with Trailbreaker in tow. He was beginning to devolve into the engineer's shadow by this point, and Wheeljack had to admit he felt more relaxed about his structural integrity with him around.

"What the pit is that?" Wheeljack looked around as he came into the recreation room, currently filled with some music in a language he wasn't entirely familiar with.

"Mexican Rap, 'Jack! Though it should be called Mexican Hippie Rap." Blaster grinned widely while he sat in the middle of the makeshift playpen. Blaster had taken the caretaker role for the sparklings while their respective, uh, 'mates' and/or siblings were on-duty.

"Do you even understand that?" Trailbreaker piped as he followed Wheeljack to the dispenser.

"Every word! Hello? Communications Officer Blaster at your service? I'm fluent in every major language spoken on this planet! Though the 'dead languages' are Rewind's field." Blaster chuckled as he felt a tug on his hand, forcing him to look down to Red Alert. "What's up, little buddy?"

Red Alert made soft clicking sounds as he pointed to Steeljaw. The Autobot cassette was currently giving a back ride to Mirage and Sideswipe under the careful supervision of Rewind.

"Want a ride, too? All right, let's call Steelie over." Blaster called his cassette, carefully depositing the third sparkling on his back before he allowed Rewind to take him away to continue the ride around the playpen.

The communications officer looked to the other side of the pen where Eject was playing with and keeping watch of Perceptor and Prowl. The sparklings were currently sitting amidst a long sheet of paper, decorating it with finger paints made for them by Ratchet. Both sparklings had made a mess of themselves and Eject just as much as they had on the paper.

"Boy, those two are going to need a visit to the wash racks!" The large orange mech laughed softly as he tapped a finger to the rhythm of the rather cheesy music he was playing.

"God, that was the worst patrol duty I've endured in orns!" Hound all but growled as he made his way into the recreation room, heading right away for a cube of energon.

"What's the matter?" Trailbreaker asked.

"Ironhide put me on patrol with Huffer. Four fragging hours on the road with Huffer! With Huffer of all 'bots! H-U-F-F-E-R. Huffer!" The normally calm and cheerful Hound threw his arms on the air in evident exasperation. "Primus, I have nothing against Ironhide, and I know he's trying to do his best, but... man, I miss Prowl already!"

Prowl looked up from his painting when he heard his designation, recognizing it after being called that by the other adult Autobots. He looked over to the congregation of adult Autobots before he tapped his head, imitating Jazz's 'scratch on his head' whenever he was confused about something. Of course, the maneuver only managed to dirty his helmet even more.

"Ah well. I'm going to pick up Mirage and go get a good wash and some relaxing time." Hound downed his energon cube in one gulp before he headed for the playpen to retrieve his currently stuck-as-sparkling mate. The scout looked around for Mirage before a panicked look spread across his face. "Where's Mirage??"

"Uh? He's right here with Ste-- What the... where is he?!" Rewind looked around hurriedly when he noticed the missing Sparkling.

"Oh brother." Blaster stood up to carefully and quickly look around to make sure the sparkling wasn't hiding behind him. "I knew I should have asked Ratchet to disable his cloaking device!"

"Mirage? Mirage where are you?!" Hound began to search all across the ample room, genuinely concerned about the baby-Ligier's well being. "Oh, Primus! Please, let him be all right! Let him be all right!"

Trailbreaker, Wheeljack, Eject, and Rewind scattered across the room with Hound to search for the missing sparkling while Blaster kept his eye on the remaining four, silently thanking neither of them could turn invisible and that Sunstreaker had removed Sideswipe's jet pack.

Perceptor clicked happily as he applied yet another layer of paint to Prowl's chevron with a friendly pat on his head before he noticed something odd on the sheet of paper. New hand prints that appeared out of nowhere leaving a trail across the paper and then over the floor of the recreation room.

Steeljaw took notice of the trail and made a sound to get Blaster's attention, nodding his head towards the trail of hands and chassis parts left by an invisible crawler. "Hey, Hound! Look there."

Hound looked on the direction Blaster pointed to and let out a big and loud sigh of relief, fetching the invisible sparkling. Mirage's happy clicking sounds and paint soaked not-so-invisible-anymore hands clapping confirmed the scout's suspicious. "Primus almighty, Mirage! You almost made my servos lock up!"

Unfortunately for the jeep, Mirage knew how to turn invisible but was still at a loss about the opposite operation, so he was stuck invisible. "I better take you to Ratchet and have a talk about deactivating that cloaking device for the time being. Thanks guys. I better go now before he decides to play Hide-and-Seek again."

"I think I better go back to work." Wheeljack waved to Blaster and his cassettes before he left the recreation room with Trailbreaker in tow.

"Someone's going to have to clean Mirage's mess. And that someone surely won't be me." Blaster chuckled as he stretched his limbs a bit just as Optimus Prime came into the room. "Hi, Optimus. How's everything going?"

"Aside from multiple complaints about how Ironhide set up the patrol teams and schedules, things are as fine as they can be given the situation." The Autobot leader headed for the playpen. "How is everything around here?"

"As fine as possible, considering Mirage decided to play hide-and-seek with Hound without informing him. Almost blew his processors with the worry." Before the communications officer could talk any further, a loud cry came from Sideswipe's general direction, the red sparkling was currently sitting on the ground after Rewind had removed him and Red Alert from Steeljaw's back. "Huh, what's up, 'Sides?" He picked up the crying sparkling just as Red Alert and Perceptor joined the crying fest. Prowl whimpered, and his little door wings drooped visibly as he addressed his best distressed look towards their care taker. "Oh, slag! I forgot!"

Prime watched as Blaster gathered the crying sparklings and shoved them into his arms unceremoniously before he rushed towards the exit. "B-Blaster??"

"Hold 'em for a second, Prime. I gotta fetch their energon!" Before the larger Autobot could utter another word, the orange mech left the room.

Optimus looked down to the sparklings in his arms, not exactly sure of what to do with the hungry little 'bots to calm their cries. "Don't cry!" He pleaded softly as he rocked the four sparklings. Sideswipe was wailing like a banshee by this point, and even Prowl had joined the cries, proving that he could cry as loud, if not more, than Perceptor and Sideswipe together. "Primus!" He was thankful the sparklings were small enough to fit perfectly in his arms despite the tantrums they were throwing at the very moment.

"Don't cry, please. Blaster will be here with your energon in a moment." He rocked the sparklings gently and revved his engine in futile attempts to calm them, growing more and more uncomfortable as the seconds ticked away with no sign of Blaster anywhere.

"Sorry about that, I couldn't find Sideswipe's stack in that mess that's his and Sunstreaker's room!" Blaster rushed back into the recreation room with cubes of energon made especially for the little 'bots. Eject and Rewind reached out for Prowl and Red Alert as Optimus knelt to their level, allowing them to take the unhappy sparklings from his arms. The Cassette twins quickly controlled the situation, calming them down as they were being fed. Blaster offered a cube to Prime so he could help him to feed Perceptor while he did the same with Sideswipe.

After a few moments, the cries had been replaced by soft sounds coming from the sparklings as their hunger was satiated. "Do you have to deal with this every day?" Optimus felt oddly exhausted all of a sudden.

"Nah, it can be worse." Blaster laughed at the look of horror the bearer of the Matrix was giving him. "But it's not always bad, don't worry."

* * *

A little later, after Optimus Prime had managed to pry Perceptor away from his frame to go back to his duties, most of the other Autobots came into the room. Jazz, Ironhide, Inferno, and Bluestreak were first in line, coming to pick up their respective sparklings.

"Had a good day, guys?" The communications officer grinned as he cradled the sparklings in his arms, holding them out for the others to retrieve.

"Mine went better than Ironhide's, that's for sure." Jazz grinned as he retrieved Prowl. "Woah! What happened to ya? Someone's gonna need a good wash!" Prowl merely fluttered his door wings silently, happy to see Jazz. The visored mech couldn't help but grin and tickle the sparkling's nose playfully.

"Pft! Excuse me! I haven't been required to program schedules and patrol teams in like, oh, just six or so million of years." The red van grumbled as he picked up Perceptor who he and Ratchet were taking care of for the time being. "Good grief! Look at this mess, young gentlebot!" He laughed softly and patted the sparkling's head. Perceptor was already halfway into recharge mode.

Inferno shook his head and thanked Blaster before he picked up Red Alert and bounced him contently in his arms before he headed to the dispenser for some energon for himself.

"Thanks, Blaster. I better take him back to Sunny now." Bluestreak picked up Sideswipe. The sparkling was, surprisingly, already in recharge after wearing himself out with his previous wailing session.

"No problem guys! Now, I think me and my boys are going to get some rest!" Eject, Rewind, and Steeljaw transformed as the orange Autobot opened the panel of his chest for them. Once his cassettes were back inside, Blaster waved and left the room, humming to the tune of 'Welcome to the Jungle'.


	3. Twinkle, Twinkle Bluestreak

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 03 - Twinkle, Twinkle Bluestreak.  
Notes: And the fun never stops in the Ark!

* * *

"No. No. No. No. Most definitely no." Bluestreak shook his head vigorously and crossed his arms across his chest.

"C'mon, Blue!" Sunstreaker pleaded in an uncharacteristically sweet tone. "Please?"

"No. He's -your- brother. You do it!" The gunner glared at his lover while the golden twin bounced his restless sparkling brother on his leg.

"Please?" Sunstreaker's hands were holding Sideswipe's little frame straight as he bounced him gently. "He's going to throw a fit if I get out of his sight right now. Do you want to make him cry?"

"Fine." Bluestreak groaned in defeat and turned around to leave the twins' room where he was currently staying, helping the golden Lamborghini to look after his baby brother -and make sure Sunstreaker wouldn't sneak out to try and imprint his bite marks over Wheeljack's frame. "But the next time, you're doing this."

Bluestreak walked down the halls of the Ark towards the med bay, rubbing the back of his helmet, unsure about how he would bring up the situation to Ratchet. "Uhm, Ratchet?"

"What is it?" The CMO turned around as he stopped scrubbing Perceptor's little body. The happily flailing sparkling was held in place by Ironhide.

"There's a problem with Sideswipe. He doesn't want to recharge, he's irritable, and he's not accepting the energon Sunstreaker's trying to feed him." The gunner turned his gaze to the floor, feeling Ratchet's optics shooting an angry look in his general direction. "Could you come to check him, please?"

Ratchet turned to Ironhide and handed him the washcloth before he washed his own hands and stalked past the Datsun towards the twins' room. Bluestreak followed suit, relaying more information to the CMO about the sparkling's behavior.

When they reached the room, Sideswipe was whimpering and trashing around in his brother's arms, visibly upset. Ratchet picked the sparkling and set him in the berth, pulling his scanner out to run a quick diagnostic. He stroked the flailing, whimpering baby Lamborghini's middle to soothe him and frowned at the results of his scan. "Alright, which one of you fraggers fed him regular energon?"

Sunstreaker pointed to Bluestreak right away. The Datsun glared to his lover before he nodded in defeat, raising his hand to admit his 'guilt'.

"You think Wheeljack and I have been preparing all those special energon cubes just because we can?" The large white and red Autobot huffed and picked up the distressed Sideswipe, handing him over to Blustreak before he opened a panel on his forearm, and subspaced a few items. "Their systems cannot process regular energon yet. That's why they require a brew specifically made for each one."

To demonstrate Ratchet's points, Sideswipe made more distressed sounds before he emptied the unwanted energon right on Bluestreak's hood. "Argh!" Taken by surprise by the sparkling's action, Bluestreak fell backwards, throwing the red twin in the air.

Sunstreaker dove to catch his baby brother at the same time as Ratchet. The two standing Autobots slammed their fists squarely on the fallen gunner's head. "You son of a glitch, watch it!" both medic and golden twin yelled at the same time.

"Sorry! He scared me! I didn't mean to throw him." Blustreak rubbed his now dented helmet as Sideswipe made soft clicking sounds, amused by the gray mech's misfortune. "You could have warned me he'd do that."

"Excuse me, I was too busy preparing something to alleviate his discomfort," Ratchet answered angrily and turned his attention back to the items he had subspaced, preparing a fluid he poured into a small cube. "Give him five units every joor until he finally recharges. And make sure to give him five more every joor when he's back online. I'll forward the prescription to Blaster, too." The medic offered the cube to Sunstreaker who was cleaning the remnants of the expelled energon from his sparkling twin's face. "And you," Ratchet turned to look at Bluestreak. "Get yourself cleaned and go to the med bay first thing tomorrow to have that dent looked at."

Bluestreak nodded and watched the larger mech leave the room. "How can Blaster endure all this?"

"Humans would say something along the lines of 'He's a natural'." Sunstreaker subspaced a small instrument he dipped into the cube and offered it to Sideswipe who was comfortably cradled on his older twin's arm. The sparkling eyed the glowing substance with a look that could only be interpreted as 'is this going to make me sick, too?'. "It's good, 'Sides." If Sideswipe understood what the golden Lamborghini said, Bluestreak didn't know, but the reassuring tone seemed to be enough to encourage the baby-Lambo to accept the offered substance.

Bluestreak stayed sitting on the floor, watching Sunstreaker feed the prescription to the sparkling. Bluestreak knew his partner had a 'softer' side he hardly cared to show to anyone else, even to Sideswipe or himself. But to witness the devoted care the golden Lamborghini could dispense over his twin spoke volumes of just how strong their bond was and how much he really loved his twin.

"Are you going to sit there and stare all night?" The Countach's voice snapped him out of his daze.

"Huh?"

"Go get yourself cleaned lest you want to recharge in the floor tonight. You're not getting into this berth unless you get yourself cleaned." Sunstreaker quipped amusedly, setting aside the cube containing the sparkling's prescription and laid Sideswipe over his shoulder on his stomach, stroking his back gently. The sparkling made soft clicking sounds as he felt himself drifting into recharge by the soothing motions on his back.

"Oh, right. I'll be right back." The gunner left the room, grumbling to himself as he finally came to notice the foul scent that came from the energon on his chest plate. "Ugh."

"Heya, Blue, what's up?" Jazz greeted the gunner as he carried the sparkling Prowl in his arms, still covered in finger paint to the point it was impossible to see his original paintjob anymore. "What happened there?"

"Hi, Jazz. Uh, Sideswipe threw up on me." The gunner eyed the sparkling in Jazz's arms. Every time he looked at Prowl, he couldn't help but feel something was totally wrong in the universal balance when the Autobot he looked up to was literally looking up to him instead.

"Ouch." The saboteur winced half heartedly and patted the younger mech's shoulder. "Better go get that cleaned before the smell sticks t'ya for a full week. Sunny's goin' to evict ya from that room if that happens."

"I know. Is Prowl giving you trouble?"

"Him? Other than tryin' to get everythin' he can get a hold of into his mouth, he's pretty manageable. Unless ya skip his meal, then he can cry loud enough ta make Megatron beg t'be shot." The sparkling Datsun looked up to Jazz with a curious look before he looked back to Bluestreak, his bright blue optics fixed on the gunner's doorwings as the adult Autobots talked. The baby-Datsun watched the gunner's doorwings move a little up, then drop a little and then twitch a bit to reflect whatever it was he was talking about with Jazz.

From the corner of his optics, the saboteur watched his currently stuck-as-ssparkling mate's little doorwings move a little up, drop and twitch, imitating Bluestreak's. "Alright, Blue. I'll let ya go get washed. This gentlebot here needs a good wash himself. See ya." Jazz waved to Bluestreak, chuckling softly as Prowl imitated him and waved with some difficulty.

"See you two." The young Datsun smiled a bit, feeling more relaxed after the short exchange with the, uh, 'officers'.

When Bluestreak returned to Sideswipe's and Sunstreaker's quarters, the adult Lamborghini was laying on his back comfortably, still online while his baby twin recharged on his chest, a golden hand holding him close. "All clean?"

"Yeah." The marksman headed for the berth, laying on his side with his doorwings barely touching the edge of the recharging platform. "Hey, Sunny, I'm sorry I got 'Sides sick."

"It's okay." The older twin nodded, smiling to his lover before he moved a little to settle better against Bluestreak, still holding Sideswipe to his chestplate. The gunner smiled in relief and cuddled against the Lamborghini, placing a hand over the sparkling too before both Autobots fell into recharge.


	4. Holding out for a Saboteur

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 04 - Holding out for a Saboteur.  
Notes: Jazz does the parentin' business!

* * *

"Ya know," Jazz smiled down to the sparkling in his arms as he filled the sink of his and Prowl's private wash rack. "For someone who's always prim an' proper an' all business, ya sure can get yourself messy."

Prowl tilted his head curiously as he was addressed. He patted Jazz's face before he drove his attention back to the sink. Jazz chuckled softly and dipped his fingers in the water to make sure it was at a good temperature. He had found out a couple of days ago the baby Datsun was picky about the water temperature. Too cold, and he'd cry a storm to stay away from it. Too hot, and he'd be wiggling uncomfortably to the point half of the sink's contents would be spilled on the floor. However, if the temperature was of his liking, he'd sit still until the saboteur was done.

"Okay, I think it's just 'bout right. I'll need a good wash after this, too, so whatddaya say I get that paint off ya an' then we hit the rack back there?" The Porsche didn't wait for any kind of reply from his stuck-as-sparkling mate and put him in the sink. The sparkling wiggled for a moment to make himself comfortable before he looked up at Jazz expectantly.

The saboteur took that as his cue and dipped the washcloth in the water before he poured some cleaning solution on the cloth, placing a hand behind Prowl's back to keep him straight as he began to scrub his head to wash off the paint left there by Perceptor and Prowl himself. "I'd say ya had one heck of a time with those finger paints." Jazz chuckled as Prowl replied with a twitch of his little doorwings.

"I wonder if ya're ever goin' to make any sound aside of cryin'. I've heard all the other sparklin's click, but ya don't." The saboteur scrubbed the back of Prowl's helmet watching the sparkling's little doorwings move and twitch in response to every touch. He had learned to interpret much of his mate's body language, especially his doorwings. Just like Bluestreak, Prowl could be very expressive through said appendages, thoughsubtly.

"Man, just 'bout how much paint did ya pour on yourself?" Most of the paint had diluted in the water of the sink, making it hard to clean whatever remnants were left on the sparkling's chassis. "Alright, I think this is the best I can do. Time t'hit th'rack." Jazz picked the soaked sparkling and held him against his chest in one arm to remove the cork of the sink before he stepped into the rack. "Now, hold still li'l guy, the water's not goin' t'be at your favorite temperature right away."

The sparkling Prowl fluttered his doorwings curiously before the spray of the faucet fell upon his and Jazz's body. The water was particularly colder than the saboteur had predicted. Prowl's doorwings literally trashed around as he kicked his legs, trying to get out of the spray as loud cries came from his little form. "Shit!" Jazz cursed and hurried to hold the sparkling out of the spray until it had warmed up some. The baby Datsun's cries ceased immediately though he was still visibly upset and distressed.

When the water warmed up enough, Jazz pulled the sparkling back into the spray, holding him against his chest in a comforting fashion. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm goin' t'have ta bug 'Jack 'bout re-adjustin' th'temperature." The saboteur held Prowl higher up on his chest, allowing the sparkling's head to rest on his shoulder. He rubbed the tiny police lights on the sparkling's roof gently, immediately seeming to calm the sparkling completely. "I promise I'll check th'water myself before I put ya under th'next time." Jazz spoke softly and reassuringly to his baby Datsun, smiling a bit as Prowl's doorwings twitched in response.

After a short while, the Porsche had washed and dried himself and the sparkling thoroughly. "Time for some energon, an' then I gotta finish some pendin' reports. Man, I don't know how can ya do all that by yourself. 'Hide an' I can barely keep up." The Porsche chuckled and fed the sparkling. Once Prowl was fed, Jazz grabbed the cube of energon he had brought for himself and sat on the desk, subspacing the pending reports and began to read them. The baby Datsun was sitting in his lap, held in place by Jazz's black hand.

Prowl looked around for a little while, finding the room to be extremely boring while compared to the fun play pen. Normally, he'd be soundly in recharge by this point, but that 'cold shower' left him very alert and with no desire to recharge anytime soon. With absolutely nothing to do, Prowl looked up to the bit of the desk he could see, finding the glowing end of a data pad hanging from the edge of the desk. Diminutive white fingers reached quickly for the desired item, intending to put the glowing piece in his mouth for good measure.

"Nu uh, that ain't for sparklin's, Prowler." Jazz proved his reflexes were faster and proceeded to take the data pad away. The baby Datsun looked at him with the cutest, most indignant frown he could muster. "Sorry, baby, ya can't have that. Ya'll have my head when ya're back ta normal if I let ya ruin it."

Jazz watched with fond amusement and rubbed Prowl's little nose with the tip of his middle finger. Prowl reflexively swatted the finger but quickly took hold of said black finger, shoving it right into his waiting mouth. "I never knew ya were such a nibbler, Prowl."

The saboteur decided the room was just too quiet for his and Prowl's taste and turned his player on, scanning for something cheerful and uplifting. He lowered the volume so it was tolerable for the baby Datsun. His patience for loud music at night was even less as sparkling than as adult. "There we go. Now be a good li'l Prowler and let Jazz do your work, 'kay?"

Prowl merely sat still in the saboteurs lap, nibbling and suckling on the offered finger contently, looking around every now and then and sometimes kicking his little legs to the rhythm of the music.

After a few hours, Jazz set the last pad down, groaning softly in exhaustion exhaustation, glad to be done with his workload. He looked down to his lap, meeting Prowl's curious blue optics. "Aren't ya goin' t'get some recharge today?" he quipped softly, very surprised to see the sparkling still wide alert and online.

"Ya're goin' t'be difficult tonight, aren't ya?" the saboteur chuckled softly and decided to stretch his legs some. "Let's see what the others are doin'."

The Porsche held the sparkling comfortably in his arms as he walked out of their shared quarters towards the recreation room to see if anyone was there. After finding only the minibots in different levels of high-grade induced intoxication, he decided to take a peek at Wheeljack's lab.

"Are you sure this is right?"

Jazz stopped as he heard Trailbreaker's voice with a hint of insecurity.

"Of course I am. Just do it." The saboteur raised an optic ridge behind his visor, hearing the sounds of struggle and metal bumping against metal. "No, no! To the left!"

"Sorry! I am not used to doing this."

"It's not rocket science. Come on, keep going!"

"Okay, but let me know if I'm doing it too hard."

Jazz looked down at the sparkling on his arms before he stared back at the door. "Oh man..." The Porsche unconsciously stepped a bit closer to the door, forcing the automatic doors opened. Taken by surprise by the unexpected action, he proceeded to cover the sparkling's eyes with his hand. "Woah! Sorry 'bout that guys I was just passin' by with Prowl an' I-- what the heck are ya two doin'?"

"Baby chairs!" Wheeljack announced proudly as he held a structure in place while Trailbreaker was struggling to screw the pieces together. "And your timing couldn't have been better! We need a test subject!"

Ignoring the deep blush on his cheeks and Prowl's little hands tugging on his own to stop obstructing his field of view, the saboteur gave a cautious look to Wheeljack. "Test subject? Ya should be workin' on gettin' them back to normal, man!"

"I am!" the engineer huffed indignantly. "But even geniuses like myself need a rest, and I decided to blow some steam building these beauties." He pointed to the three already finished chairs.

"Ya know, 'Jack. I'm all for new additions ta our arsenal, but what exactly do we need baby chairs for?" Jazz finally removed his hand from Prowl's optics, absently bouncing the sparkling in his arms.

"Well, you never know, these might come in handy if you need to go anywhere with the sparkling, and Blaster's not around or something!" Wheeljack really, really didn't like it whenever anyone suggested his inventions had no purpose. "Now, shut it and come and help me try these out."

"Fine, fine. I'll help. What do I do?"

"Just transform into your car form and I'll install it on the passenger's seat. Trailbreaker, bring me the black chair and hold Prowl for a moment." Once Prowl was secure in Trailbreaker's hands, the Lancia installed the chair made to blend with Jazz's interiors. "Let's try this out now. Trailbreaker, sit him in the chair."

Trailbreaker did as he was instructed and set the baby Datsun in the chair which automatically wrapped a series of security belts around the sparkling's frame. Prowl shot a glare to the belts, finding they restricted his movement and, more specifically, his door wings' movement.

"I think you didn't account for each sparkling's design, did you?" Trailbreaker chuckled softly, undoing the belts and pulling the sparkling out.

"Well, I was kind of hoping a different sparkling would be the first tester! Okay, I'll tweak this chair and then you can come to check it back tomorrow." The engineer dismounted the special seat, allowing Jazz to transform back and pick up the sparkling Prowl.

"I better go get some recharge. I think this gentlebot here had enough excitement for a night." The Porsche waved to the other mechs before he left the lab and headed for his and Prowl's quarters. The baby-Datsun had curled up against his chest, beginning to fall into recharge mode already. "Ya're the cutest thing, Prowler." Jazz chuckled softly as he moved into the room, heading for the recharge berth. He laid on the surface carefully, moving the sparkling to rest better against his chest before he kissed the top of his helmet. "Have a good recharge, baby."


	5. A Kindergarden 'Con

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 05 - A Kinder garden 'Con  
Notes: As if the title didn't tell you who's coming to the 'hood.

* * *

"Rise an' shine, Prowler!" Jazz grinned as he cradled the sparkling up, watching with amusement the expression of annoyance on his little face. Apparently Prowl wasn't a morning 'bot as a sparkling.

"Time for some energon before I take ya ta Blaster. Here's hopin' ya won't get yourself all messy again." the saboteur took the small cube of energon that had been prepared to suit Prowl's specific needs, feeding the sparkling with the brew.

Once Prowl was fed, Jazz left their shared quarters, heading for the recreation room where the playpen was kept. On his way there he passed by the Med bay and stopped by, hoping the CMO was already online and in duty. "Hey, Ratchet!"

The CMO looked over his shoulder to the incoming saboteur, waving lightly before he turned his attention back to the squirming Perceptor on his arms. "What do you need, Jazz?"

"I don't wanna bother ya too much, but I've been wonderin' somethin'." the Porsche fixed his hold on the baby Datsun and walked over to the medic, watching Perceptor test the ambulance's patience by moving his head away every time Ratchet tried to feed him. His wide smile and amused clicking sounds were evidence of the fun the sparkling was having with his little game. "Is it normal Prowl ain't clickin'?"

"What?" Ratchet looked up from his task.

"Well," Jazz switched the sparkling to his other arm, taking one of his hands to play with the diminutive fingers. "Ya hear all those clickin' sounds Perceptor's doin'?"

"Yes, It's a rudimentary code they're using to vocalize and communicate." Ratchet felt a light tug on the instrument he was using to feed Perceptor, finding the sparkling's mouth closed around it.

"I'm a bit worried because I've heard all the other sparklin's clickin' but Prowl hasn't made a sound if he's not cryin'." the black and white sparkling looked up to Jazz when he heard his designation, twitching his wings on response before he looked back to Ratchet and Perceptor.

"My experience with sparklings is still a little limited." the medic pried the instrument out of the red sparkling to gather some more energon to feed to him. This time Perceptor decided he was hungry enough to stop playing and accepted the substance readily. "But if his vocal processor is allowing him to cry it's unlikely to be damaged."

"I was kinda worried whatever happened t'him could have left other kind of offshoot. Ya know, I watched this movie 'bout a human child that witnessed some really bad slag and suddenly wouldn't talk again even though he was perfectly capable of speakin'." the Porsche held the baby Datsun a little closer prompting Prowl to look up to him with a curious look before he made himself comfortable on the adult Autobot's arms.

"You watch too many human films, Jazz." the medic chuckled and put down the tool he used to feed Perceptor, setting the red sparkling inside of a glass container fashioned as a temporary crib. "It could be behavioral, but I suspect it has nothing to do with a possible trauma. Put him on the table and I'll run a scan on his systems."

"'Kay. Thanks, Ratchet." Jazz did as he was instructed and set the sparkling that was his mate on the table, tickling his middle lightly when he made a sound of distress. "S'ok, Prowler. Ratchet's not gonna use any needles, I swear!"

Prowl squirmed under the assault to his middle section, fluttering his wings and kicking his legs, with a smile on his face plates, and even through all that he made absolutely no clicking sounds. When the attack was over, the baby Datsun wasted no time and inspected his surroundings, finding a tray with instruments not too far from the table he was laying on. He moved to reach for one of the shiny tools, but a red hand caught his much smaller white one.

"Hands off my tools, sparkling." Ratchet scolded playfully, laughing softly as Prowl rewarded him with an angry glare. "Someone's got a temper."

"Ya have no idea." the saboteur cackled lightly and offered his hand to the sparkling Prowl, grinning playfully at the predicted outcome. "Man, he's fond of my finger. I must taste really good."

"No comment." Ratchet hooked a series of lines, cords and wires to the sparkling's body, running a few diagnostics for the condition of his systems. "So far everything seems to be in working order. I think his silence is behavioral."

"So, it's that normal or not?"

"On Prowl's case it's probably normal. Do you even remember him being that talkative in the first place?" the CMO removed the lines, cords and wires carefully. "My assumption would be he's bringing his point across just fine without clicking, so he won't bother doing it. And when everything else fails, he'll just cry."

"An' boy, does he cry." Jazz laughed softly and picked the baby Datsun up. "All right, thank ya, Ratchet. I'll take him to Blaster before my shift starts. Want me to take Perceptor too?"

"Please." the medic picked the sparkling up while the Porsche fixed his hold on Prowl to free one arm to carry Perceptor. Once the two sparklings were secure on his arms, Jazz left the medical bay and headed straight to the recreation room. Inferno was already in there, playing for a little while with Red Alert before his own shift began.

"Howdy, Jazz." the fire engine smiled to the martini racer. He was kneeling on the other side of the pen while he played with Red Alert who was happily sitting inside the pen.

"Heya Inferno! How's it goin'?" the saboteur greeted and approached the pen. Blaster took the sparkling Perceptor to sit him next to Red Alert. Jazz looked around the pen for a moment, Steeljaw was laying on the far end with Sideswipe cuddled against him, deeply in recharge, seemingly using him as pillow. Rewind was sitting next to them, keeping the sparkling covered with a large sheet Sunstreaker insisted to place over his sparkling twin. Eject was sitting a little away from Red Alert and Perceptor.

Hound came into the room with the sparkling Mirage deeply in recharge, finally visible again. "Hey guys." he greeted the other Autobots in the room. Eject stood up and reached up for the baby Ligier, taking him to Steeljaw where Rewind tucked him under the sheet with Sideswipe.

"Time ta go, guys." Jazz announced softly and looked down to Prowl who was still on his arms. "Gotta go, Prowler. I'll be back for ya in a few joors." the saboteur kissed the baby Datsun's chevron before he handed him to Blaster and stood to leave with the other Autobots. "Man, we look like humans leavin' their kids on those day care centers before work."

"I hope Wheeljack finds a solution soon." Hound sighed as he walked out of the room with Jazz, and Inferno on tow. "The longer they stay as sparklings the more dangerous will be the situation."

"Worried about the Decepticons findin' out?" Inferno took a few quick steps to catch up with the other 'bots.

"We can't keep 'em hidden from th'Cons forever, that's definitive." the Porsche nodded and rubbed his chin in thought. "That reminds me Wheeljack wanted us ta go get some baby seats installed in our alt modes."

"Can we even trust those seats won't blow up on us, too?" Inferno asked half jokingly and half seriously.

"Don't jinx it now, Inferno!"

A pair of glowing red optics watched the Autobots walk away recording every word spoken. Laserbeak flew carefully in the direction the trio had come from, peeking carefully into the recreation room.

Steeljaw's head propped up from his paws where it had been resting, looking around for a moment. He tried to stand up but remembered the sparklings laying against him and stilled.

"Are you all right, Steeljaw?" Rewind asked, arranging the sheet better over the recharging sparklings. The lion-like cassette looked around some more before he nodded and plopped his head back over his paws, feeling something was off, but he couldn't tell what was it.

Laserbeak moved away quickly and made his way out of the Ark at full speed to deliver the recorded information.

* * *

"What are those?" Skywarp pointed to the five sparklings displayed on the screen.

"Those would be sparklings, Skywarp. Itty Bitty Cybertronians." Starscream crossed his arms as he watched the video taped by Laserbeak.

"I know what Sparklings are!" the purple and black seeker huffed indignantly. "I mean why the Autobots even have those around."

"Well," the blue and white Decepticon pointed towards a particular sparkling on the screen. "Unless Inferno and Red Alert decided to curse the universe with their offspring, that's none other than Red Alert himself."

"That means the other four are also Autobots that have become sparklings. The question is how." Thundercracker rubbed his chin in thought.

"That's irrelevant for now. If these are indeed Autobots reversed to such defenseless state, then Prime's forces are down several vital members." Megatron tapped a finger to his lip components in thought.

"Megatron, Course of Action?"

The Decepticon leader turned to Soundwave with a smile. "Send Laserbeak, Buzzaw and Ratbat and bring them to me."

Soundwave nodded and ejected the aforementioned cassettes instructing them to bring the sparklings unharmed.

"What are we going to do with them? Terminate them?" Starscream looked at Megatron with a victorious smile. This was just too good to pass.

"Eventually."


	6. Beautiful Wheeljack

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 06 - Beautiful Wheeljack.  
Notes: Jazzvision in action and the Cassetticons strike. I stink at anything battle scene-ish when it's in english. And that ryhmed, go figure! DX

* * *

Jazz hummed and danced happily around the halls to a melody he was currently playing on his radio. Inferno and Hound only watched in amusement and slight surprise how easily their current second-in-command could lose himself to the music that seemed to cheer him up no matter what.

The bouncy Autobot stopped his dancing once they reached their destination, Wheeljack's laboratory. He was about to greet the engineer when the doors cycled open and an unexpected scene appeared before his optics. "Frag damn it, you guys!" The saboteur turned around quickly and sprawled himself over the entrance to try and block the view. "Don't look!"

Hound and Inferno exchanged glances before they dared a peek from above and under Jazz's arm. "Huh?" Inferno scratched his head a little, not understanding what had freaked Jazz up.

"Hey there!" Wheeljack greeted cheerfully without looking up. He was leaning over Trailbreaker, his hands busy poking and prodding the insides of Trailbreaker's mid section.

Jazz turned to look back at them and had to double take. His 'Jazz vision' had displayed a naughtier scene for his CPU. The saboteur slumped and rubbed his neck wearily. _Man, I think I need to get laid soon. And Prowl's still a sparklin'. Sucks to be me 'bout right now._

"I'll attend to you guys in a moment. I'm just fixing a few loose components here," the engineer continued with his work while Trailbreaker greeted the new comers. Once Wheeljack was done and Trailbreaker had vacated the table he turned to the trio of Autobots. "Who wants to go first?"

On cue, both Inferno and Hound pointed at Jazz who turned to give them a look that would have screamed 'traitors' if they could have seen it. "I'll go." The seat hadn't exploded on him last night, so the Porsche wasn't too worried about fireworks going off on his leathery interiors.

Trailbreaker picked the seat made for Jazz while the martini racer transformed into his alternate mode to have it installed. A few minutes later, the seat was in place, and Jazz transformed back, commenting about the light weight of the added accessory.

"Where's Sunstreaker? Or should I have it installed in Bluestreak instead?" Wheeljack asked with a cautious tone in his voice. He totally didn't want to be alone with Sunstreaker, much less when he was going to have to slip his hands inside his alt mode. All things considered, Wheeljack didn't feel like being bitten to deactivation by a rabid Countach.

"He had to go on patrol earlier today. He should be 'ere in 'bout a joor or two." Jazz informed the engineer, giving an apologetic smile when Wheeljack just gave him an uncomfortable look. "Sorry, man. I don't do the schedulin'. Ya'll have to take that one to Ironhide."

"Dully noted. Come on, Inferno, we gotta get your seat installed."

* * *

Blaster smiled and bounced Prowl on his leg, watching Steeljaw and Eject play with the other sparklings while Rewind cradled Sideswipe in his arms. "Gave 'Sides his dose yet, Rewind?"

"Affirmative." The black cassette nodded. "Though, that was the last dose in that cube. Did Ratchet give you more?"

"No, he didn't. He's not due for another joor, right?" Blaster set the sparkling Prowl down, giving him a little pat on his back before he stood up and crossed over the little fence of the pen. "I better go ask Ratchet if he'll still need more and prepare more if needed. I'll be right back."

Ratbat watched the large mech leave the room from his hiding spot with Buzzaw and Laserbeak and readied to launch himself into the recreation room.

"You fragging son of a glitch!"

The bat cassette froze in midair and rushed back to his hiding place alongside his brothers Buzzaw and Laserbeak, watching the blur of a Rally Lancia Stratos dash beneath them followed by the yellow blur of a very, very pissed off Lamborghini and a black Pickup on tow.

"It was an accident!" Wheeljack ran as fast as his bipedal mode could allow. "It's just a little scratch!"

"Little scratch?! Just a little scratch?! I'll show you what a little scratch is when I get my hands on you!" Sunstreaker was livid, sporting a small scratch on his side. Scratch or not, he needed little excuse to try and rip the engineer a new one.

"Sunstreaker, calm down!" Trailbreaker called as he tried his best to keep up with the pair and try to keep Wheeljack in one piece.

"Oh boy." Eject looked up just in time to see Sunstreaker's dashing form followed by Trailbreaker. "I hope Wheeljack can run really, really fast or Trailbreaker tackles Sunny first. Otherwise the Coach's gonna be pissed."

"You're telling me." Rewind sighed heavily and rocked Sideswipe gently when the baby Lamborghini began to whimper.

Steeljaw stiffened and looked up to the entrance just in time to see the Decepticon cassettes dive through. The lion cassette jumped in front of the sparklings and Eject to provide some cover.

"Oh, no!" Rewind rushed to pick the other sparklings barely dodging a shot from Laserbeak. "Blaster!" he called through their com-link. "We're under attack. Laserbeak and associates are here - we need back up!"

Eject retrieved his rifle and aimed for the flying Buzzaw and Ratbat from behind Steeljaw who was enduring the fire that was pouring over him, refusing to move despite the wounds he was now sustaining. "Steeljaw's injured! We need back up right now!"

"I'm on it, damn it!" Rewind tried his best to run to gather the sparklings that were now huddled behind Eject and Steeljaw. Perceptor and Red Alert were now crying as loud as their vocal processors could allow, and Mirage and Prowl were whimpering but huddling against the other sparklings.

"Blaster to Prime, do you copy?!"

"Prime here. What is it Blaster?"

"The cassetticons are attacking the nursery! Eject, Rewind, and Steeljaw are holding them back but they won't last much longer."

Jazz, Hound, Inferno, Ironhide, and Sunstreaker froze at the report from their communications officer.

"Let's go!" Jazz literally jumped over the back of his seat and rushed out of the command center, followed by Ironhide, Optimus Prime, and Bluestreak.

Sunstreaker was already on his way back to the recreation room where the 'nursery' was located, followed by Wheeljack and Trailbreaker in time to see Buzzaw rush out of the room with a crying Sideswipe held in his claws.

"Put my brother down!" Sunstreaker aimed and fired furiously, brushing the Decepticon cassette's wing producing a small trail of smoke right away. Before he could shoot again Trailbreaker pulled his arm down. "Let me go!"

"We can't get him here - you could hit Sideswipe!" the black pickup tried his best to hold back the furious Lamborghini.

Jazz arrived with the other Autobot in tow just in time to see Ratbat and Laserbeak flying at full speed out of the recreation room, carrying the remaining sparklings in their feet. "Prowl!"

The Porsche chased the Decepticon cassettes as fast as he could, pulling out his rifle and trying to steady his aim, growling in frustration as he found his targets moving too much to risk to shoot. "Stop!" The saboteur chased the two cassettes out of the Ark crying out in desperation when they reached the entrance, knowing once they were out it would be impossible to reach them anymore. "Prowl!!"

The saboteur fell to his knees and punched the arid soil. "They're gone!"

"What do we do now?" Huffer dared to ask, carrying Eject's injured form.

"We know where they're going." Ironhide helped Jazz up. "Let's knock on Megatron's door and get our sparklings back."

"Brawn, Huffer, take Eject, Rewind, and Steejaw to Ratchet and stand guard with him. Blaster, call Skyfire and tell him to meet us along the way," Optimus Prime instructed before he turned to the remaining Autobots. "Everyone else, transform and roll out!"  
The Autobots transformed and drove at full speed in pursuit of the sparklings' captors. "Sunstreaker wounded Buzzaw. I don't think he'll last long flying in that condition," Trailbreaker informed. "Hopefully we'll be able to catch up to them before they reach their base."

"And if we don't, I have a rocket with Megatron's name on it, ready," Sunstreaker growled furiously as he drove as fast as his engine permitted, Bluestreak was barely able to keep up with him.

"Not if I get him first," Jazz stated dryly.

Ironhide sped up as much as he could, trying to catch up with Jazz who was currently leading the convoy, being the fastest in vehicle form. "Let's concentrate on getting the sparklings back; we'll see about kicking decepti-butt afterwards."


	7. I'm Walking on Skywarp

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 07 - I'm Walking on Skywarp  
Notes: Decepticon centric chapter zomg! Well ok, Decepticon -and- Sparkling centric, but then again this whole thing goes around the sparklings.

* * *

Thundercracker grumbled heavily, floating in his current position where he awaited the arrival of Soundwave's cassetticons. Soundwave had insisted one of the Seekers should meet up with Laserbeak and the others. Now he could see why.

"Thundercracker reporting. Buzzaw is injured - I'll take him and his sparkling back to base." The blue Seeker sighed heavily once he closed the com-link and transformed into his jet mode, slowing down as much as possible to allow Buzzaw to deposit the crying Sideswipe inside his cockpit before he transformed back into his tape form and dropped onto the back seat. Laserbeak and Ratbat continued their flight alongside the blue F-15.

When Thundercracker reached the Decepticon underwater base, Soundwave was ready to receive his cassette, petting his head gently before he opened his chest's compartment to allow him entrance and help his autorepair systems to fix the damage. "Megatron," He turned to the screen to his commander's quarters. "Retrieval: successful."

Thundercracker removed the sparkling from his cockpit, setting him down far more gently than Ratbat and Laserbeak did, hoping that would at least keep the sparkling's crying down a little. "They're too loud."

"Sparklings are always loud." Starscream crossed his arms and took a few steps towards the group of sparklings. Red Alert was literally wailing a storm. Ratbat had dropped him first and his little aft hadn't enjoyed the landing. Perceptor was also crying but was far more quiet than Red Alert. Mirage was whimpering loudly but wasn't crying just yet. Prowl, despite his own whimpers, had pushed the other sparklings to gather together in attempts to keep each other comforted by their proximity. "What now, oh, mighty leader?" The air commander turned to look back at Megatron as he came into the command room.

"The Autobots surely will come to try to retrieve our new hostages. Dirge, Ramjet, and Thrust, I want you to delay the Autobots," the Decepticon commander instructed the conehead trine and turned to get a better look at the sparklings, smirking when the group of Autobot babies huddled closer together instinctively. "Starscream, take one of them for analysis. You're free to do anything you need to find out how they were turned into sparklings."

"Why would you want to know that?"

"Isn't it obvious?" The silver mech turned to face the leader of the first trine. "If we can discover what triggered the regression, we can create a weapon that will turn the other Autobots into sparklings. No more Autobots to stop us."

"Very well. But I suspect this will take quite a while." Starscream looked down at the group of sparklings, looking for one that he could take for experimentation. Red Alert was too loud, Sideswipe looked ill, and he knew better than to take Perceptor with him. That left Prowl and Mirage, and somehow, Starscream didn't trust the one sparkling that was literally glaring daggers at him through his fluid leaking optics and distressed, scared whimpers. "I'll take this one."

Mirage clicked loudly, flailing his little arms as he was picked up by Starscream, reaching for the other sparklings. Prowl tried to crawl after Starscream to retrieve his friend but was sent back to the other sparklings with a push of the seeker's leg. The baby Datsun glared angrily at the white, red, and blue seeker before he did the only thing he could at that moment - cry so hard and so loud that he would have made Elita One proud.

"Ugh! Good look keeping an eye on them!" Starscream covered his audio receptors the best he could and rushed out of the command center to escape the cry of the strategist. Mirage was crying now, too, but his cries were far lower and far more bearable than Prowl's and his chorus of crying sparklings.

"Shut up!" Megatron covered his own audio receptors. He tried to threaten Prowl into silence aiming his fusion cannon at him, but he found he couldn't stand to take his hand away from his receptors for more than a few seconds. "Soundwave, do something!"

The communications officer knelt down and did the only thing he knew could calm a sparkling. His own audio receptors were suffering, but he managed to rest a hand on the baby Datsun's head and stroked it with as much gentleness as he'd do with his own cassettes. Prowl's cries died down under the comforting touch despite who it was coming from.

Red Alert kept crying, his little vocalizer was already hurting, but he had no other way to voice his discomfort. However, his optics caught a glimpse of a somewhat familiar form and made a soft sound of excitement as he crawled his way to climb on top of Ravage's back who was sprawled on the ground, covering his own audio receptors with his paws. Upon feeling the additional weight, Ravage hissed and shook his body, trying to force the sparkling off his back to no avail.

Soundwave's shoulders drooped a little when Sideswipe decided to empty his little body of unwanted energon once more, right on Megatron's boot no less.

"Argh! Why you little piece of scrap!" The Decepticon leader jumped away and shook his foot to try and rid it from the half-processed energon before he glared in direction of the sparkling and aimed his fusion canon once more.

Before Megatron could do anything, Prowl's cries filled the room once more, and, much to the Decepticon's horror, he found the sparkling was nowhere to be found. "Where is he?!"

"Sparkling: hiding under main console." Soundwave had barely caught the glimpse of Prowl's foot sliding through the crevice between the ground and the underwater base's main console before he started crying again.

"Ugh! Soundwave, do something!"

There were days when the Decepticon communications officer believed Primus had a personal vendetta against him. Today happened to be one of those days. Without a word, the Decepticon picked up Sideswipe and began to stroke his middle gently, retrieving a piece of cloth to clean the remnants of the expelled energon from his face. "Autobot sparkling: ill. Medical attention strongly advised."

When Sideswipe's cries died down under the attention of the Decepticon, Prowl's own cries ceased; however, the sparkling remained hidden under the console.

"Hook's not around though!" Skywarp rubbed his head. Two rounds of the baby Datsun's cries had been enough to give him the Cybertronian equivalent of a headache.

"I'm going to get cleaned of this mess. Soundwave, you're in charge of the brats for the time being. When Hook is back, you can hand that infernal Autobot to him." Megatron rubbed his own head in exasperation and left the room as soon as possible, not wishing to risk a third installment of Prowl's cries and whimpers.

"...Understood." Soundwave merely looked around and shook his head lightly. It was going to be a very, very long day.

* * *

Starscream wasn't sure whether he liked or not all the happy clicking Mirage was aiming in his general direction. He surely preferred the clicking over the crying, but this sparkling's happy clicks were like the Energizer Bunny... they kept going and going -- And Starscream wasn't one of the most patient 'bots in the world.

"Let's see if I can find his voice modules, maybe that'll shut him up." The seeker fumbled with one of the sparkling's open panels, trying to navigate his way through the immature structure.

The aerospace commander didn't know much about sparklings, but he did know one thing for sure: sparklings couldn't transform. This knowledge made his natural scientific curiosity get the best of him when his fingers came across the baby Ligier's transformation cog and he couldn't help but try to manipulate it.

Starscream barely had the time to take his hand away before the familiar sound of the cog doing its work filled his audio receptors, and where once laid the sparkling designated as Mirage was a miniature version of a racing car, small enough to sit a human infant in.

The seeker rubbed his chin in thought, wondering why, if the transformation cog seemed to operate normally, sparklings were unable to transform at will. He didn't have much time to ponder the matter further as he noticed the baby Ligier's engine revving rather excitedly, making good use of whatever suspension his vehicle mode possessed, bouncing on his tires lightly. "...Don't you dare!"

Mirage's happy clicking began anew, and before Starscream could utter another word, the diminutive vehicle's engine revved loudly and propelled the sparkling forward, right onto Starscream.

* * *

Soundwave sat cross-legged on the ground, struggling to keep Sideswipe calm while the sparkling Perceptor crawled all over his frame, poking, prodding and pressing any surfaces that attracted his attention. It had been four times in the past 10 Earth minutes that the sparkling had pushed the button that forced his chest's compartment open, ejecting Laserbeak at least twice and leaving Rumble's cassette form stuck on his plate the remaining two.

Ravage wasn't doing much better. The slick black Cassetticon had given up trying to buck the sparkling Red Alert off his back. Somehow, he had managed to stay firmly affixed to his frame despite Ravage's best imitation of a bucking bronco, and thus, the black cassette merely gave a back ride to the now very happy Red Alert.

Skywarp and Thundercracker hadn't had any success in trying to locate where exactly Prowl was hiding, and that had proved to be a problem. Everytime someone, anyone, so much as hinted intents of harming any of the sparklings currently under Soundwave's care, Prowl cried again.

Soundwave theorized Prowl, sparkling as he might currently be, was definitely not defenseless. His cries weren't just annoying and inconvenient - they were painful. Most certainly the sonic waves he was producing during his very, very loud crying fits were strong enough to damage internal components, and once the sparkling realized his crying immobilized their captors, he began to make full use of the unexpected weapon.

To make matters even more unfavorable for him and his comrades, the sparkling proved to understand the importance of the console he chose to hide under as they just couldn't afford to shoot or destroy the console just to retrieve him. Right now, they were at the sparklings' mercy.

"I give up!" Skywarp groaned and tossed his arms into the air. "I'll go check on Starscream."

"I'll go with you." Thundercracker followed his wingmate out of the room, leaving Soundwave and Ravage to deal alone with the Autobot sparklings.

"Primus! Those things are annoying." Skywarp huffed and crossed his arms across his chest, glad to be away from the sparklings.

"They are a handful." The primarly blue seeker nodded as he walked alongside his mate. "I just hope this plan won't end up backfiring on us."

"That won't happen." The black and purple F-15 took a few quick steps and turned to face his companion. "Once Starscream can figure out how to transform the other Autobots, we can just dump them in some hole and let them rot!"

Thundercracker opened his mouth to say something, but after a several moments without a word coming from his voice modules, Skywarp poked his trine mate's chest gently. "You ok, TC?"

"...Shit!"

"Uh?"

Thundercracker pointed behind the other seeker, forcing Skywarp to look over his shoulder as his own optics widened in horror.

A miniature Racing Ligier had stopped a few meters away from them, his engine revving excitedly while loud, cheerful clicks erupted from its form. The engine revved more, and the front tires moved from side to side, as if he was trying to 'aim'.

"Run," the blue seeker said calmly while still staring at the diminutive Gitanes 'sponsored' racing car while he filled the hall with the sound of his little engine. His trine mate nodded vigorously before they both turned around quickly and scrambled down the hall just in time to hear the sparkling Mirage chase after them.

"I hate sparklings!" Skywarp cried as he ran as fast as he could right behind Thundercracker with Mirage in tow. The halls were too narrow for them to transform and barely wide enough for them to walk wing to wing; running past each other was definitely out of question.

"What makes you say that?!" Thundercracker's voice dripped sarcasm and rushed to hit the code to enter the control room. The door was barely halfway open by the time his wingmate ran past him before the sparkling Mirage ran the black and purple seeker over.

The blue F-15 winced visibly and ran over to his bonded's side to try and help him up, but before he could even lay a hand on him, the stuck-as-sparkling spy ran over Skywarp again.

Soundwave merely watched from his place on the ground with the remaining sparklings and hoped secretly the Autobots would arrive soon.


	8. Hello, Megatron, I love you!

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 08 - Hello, Megatron, I love you!  
Notes: Short chapter this time but the Autobots are on their way and next chapter shall have a very pissed off Lamborghini waiting for an excuse to tear Decepticons appart!

* * *

Ramjet laid on the ground atop the battered bodies of his trine mates, watching wearily as the Autobots flew towards the Decepticons' base inside Skyfire. He could feel every joint of his body aching after the brutal mistreatment delivered by Skyfire followed by Jazz and Ironhide when he was grounded.

"Did any of you write down the number of the semi-truck that ran me over?" Dirge sputtered dazedly, too pained to even care about the weight of Thrust and Ramjet over him. Megatron was going to rip them a new one for sure, but at the moment, all he wanted was to fall into blessed unconsciousness.

"Does Optimus Prime even have a license plate?" Thrust ventured to ask, not very eager to try to find out.

"Megatron will be pissed."

"To the pit with Megatron. I'm not standing between an Autobot and his sparkling ever again." Ramjet took that as his cue to just fall offline on top of his wing mates.

Inside of the Decepticons' base, things weren't going much better. Mirage was running around the control room circling around the fallen Starscream who decided to venture into the control room when he recovered from the sparkling spy's initial run over him – a bad decision as Mirage took the chance to chase him around and run him over again.

Thundercracker was unscathed , thankfully, but he had to carry Skywarp in his arms now since every time the purple and black seeker attempted to stand on his own feet, Mirage charged at him. The blue seeker wasn't sure why Mirage wasn't targeting him, but he wasn't going to complain about it.

Megatron, on the other hand, was having a hell of a time, and his patience was wearing thin. Perceptor saw fit to switch his field of interest from Soundwave's structure to the Decepticon leader's, and quite frankly, the baby microscope had a knack for finding his 'tickle spots', something he definitely didn't want his troops to find out though they were too distracted with their own predicaments to notice or care.

Ravage was growing exhausted of just trotting around in circles to entertain Red Alert, but the baby Lamborghini gave him no rest. Any attempts to stop for longer than a few minutes would prompt the threat of the sparkling crying against his audios, and that was the last thing he wanted. Prowl had hurt his sensitive audio receptors enough as it was.

Speaking of Prowl, the sparkling was still hidden, and he had been pretty silent since the last time Megatron threatened to blow Perceptor to bits. That one had actually broken one of Starscream's receptors as he had been too close to the wailing sparkling's location when the cries ensued, forcing the Decepticons to communicate through open com-link. It was dangerous to have an open com-link if Prowl cried again, and Megatron decided it was in his best interest not to tick off the baby Datsun for now, even if it meant standing Perceptor crawling all over him.

Sideswipe was still sick and distressed but seemed to be more comfortable under the expert care of Soundwave who had pulled out an specialized fuel line from one of his arms. The original purpose of that fuel line had been to nourish his cassettes during their first days online, regulating a very specific concentration of his own energon for each cassette. He hadn't used the line in a long time, but the knowledge was imprinted in him at this point. So, by all intents and purposes, he was feeding Sideswipe, and the sparkling was content enough to have some adequate energon running in his systems again.

"So, oh, grand leader, what are we going to do now?" Starscream ventured to ask, barely tilting his head to look at Megatron over his shoulder. He decided to stay laying down on the ground if he wanted to avoid the baby Ligier's wheels leaving prints all over his fuselage.

"I'm thinking." Megatron was thinking indeed – thinking it had been a terrible idea to get the sparklings in the first place and what a bad idea it had been not to investigate Prowl's ability to make their audio receptor's bleed energon in ways he thought only Elita One could. He was sorely mistaken in his belief. Being beaten like this by baby Autobots was definitely not what he had been expecting, and he would make sure to never let word of this get to any of his remaining troops on Cybertron.

"I say we just hand them back to the Autobots!" Skywarp eyed the sparkling Mirage warily. He was going to have what humans called 'nightmares' for days to come, and they would involve a certain miniature racing car.

"You glitched? Like they're going to just come and get the sparklings, shake hands, and then go away like th-- Ow!!" Starscream rubbed his dented nose after Mirage ran him over again. He made a personal note to never, ever mess with a sparkling's transformation cog if he valued his structural integrity.

"At this point I'm almost ready to go and fly them back to the Autobot base," Thundercracker heaved a sigh. He didn't care much for the sparklings, but they were definitely more trouble than they were worth.

Megatron was beginning to agree with that plan, especially now that Perceptor was nibbling and suckling on different parts of his body in attempt to satiate his curiosity. Unfortunately for him, the smacking sounds he was producing sounded like the sparkling was kissing him.

"Aww, I think he wuvs you, Mighty Megatron!" Starscream just never knew when to shut his mouth, and the Decepticon leader thanked mentally when Mirage decided to silence the seeker through running over his head yet again.

Perceptor clicked happily and perched atop the Decepticon's leader helmet, nibbling on it with those smacking sounds so happily. Megatron was glad Reflector was currently on Cybertron.

_Smack!_


	9. Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Save Me!

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 10 - Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Save Me!  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: The Autobots finally make it to the scene and they're not entirely sure they get what's going on at the Nemesis. And this, by the way is not the end yet!

* * *

"I still vote we send them back to the Autobots!" Skywarp was growing tired of his current position in Thundercracker's arms, not because he didn't like being in his arms, but the position was beginning to stiffen his joints, and he was sore enough as it was.

"Why haven't they run out of energy yet?!" Starscream cried, crossing his arms over his head to block the tires of the little racing car that had left marks of his presence all over the seeker's frame.

"They have been here for a little over an Earth hour. They aren't going to get tired or depleted of energon reserves any time soon," Thundercracker replied in a rather matter-of-fact way.

Before Starscream could retort, a loud explosion echoed through the Nemesis. "We've got company!"

"About slagging time!" Skywarp groaned and nudged Thundercracker to change his position a little while. "I can't believe I'm even saying this."

"You and me both." The blue seeker heaved a sigh and intelligently stepped aside, using Megatron's throne as a shield for what he knew was incoming.

Barely a few seconds later, the doors of the command center were forcibly opened and what appeared to be the entire Autobot army on Earth flooded the room.

"Hand over the sparklings, Megatron." Optimus Prime aimed his rifle as precaution before he took notice of the actual situation. "What in the Matrix...?"

Perceptor was the first sparkling to realize the Autobots were there and was quick to reach out for anyone who could pick him up from his current perch atop Megatron's helmet. Hound couldn't hold it back either and covered his mouth to stifle his laughter, watching little Mirage apparently keeping the Starscream under control.

Sunstreaker wasted no time to push past Prime, scanning the room before he dove to retrieve his sparkling twin from Soundwave's arms, the gun mounted in his arm pressed hard against the head of the communications officer while he clutched the tiny body of his brother against his stronger frame. Only Sideswipe's soft clicks and little black hands patting his chest for his attention kept the enraged Lamborghini from blowing off Soundwave's head.

Sideswipe clicked softly once more, trying to contain the rage of his twin which the sparkling could feel in his own spark. Realizing their unique bond was sending all his anger and murderous rage to the sparkling's own spark, the golden Lamborghini took a deep breath and pulled away from Soundwave, focusing on trying to comfort and reassure his twin through their bond. "S'ok, 'Sides. We'll be back home in no time."

"Where is Prowl?" Jazz asked in a dangerously calm and cool voice. He had no problem indulging himself with some Decepticon beating if any of them had harmed his baby Datsun.

"Sparkling: under main console." Nobody could see it, but Soundwave was glad Sideswipe seemed grateful for his attentions.

Jazz wasted no time and rushed to the main console of the Nemesis, trying to figure out how Prowl could be underneath. "Prowl? Are ya in there, baby?"

After a few seconds and some sounds of rustling, a little head almost literally popped from under the console. Jazz couldn't help but grin affectionately and reached to help the sparkling out from his hiding place. "What were ya doin' down there, Prowler?" He wasn't expecting an answer, but he couldn't help but ask.

When Hound called Mirage over, the baby Ligier rushed to him, clicking and bouncing on his tires happily. Starscream took that chance to lunge for the nearest sparkling, Prowl, and aimed his null-ray to the sparkling's head. "Drop your weapons, Autobots!"

"Don't you dare!" The Autobot saboteur raised his own rifle, aiming squarely for the Airspace commander's head. "Set him down. Now."

"I said: drop your weapons. I won't ask again!" The Seeker pressed the barrel of his weapon harder against the sparkling's head to make his point clear.

Thundercracker knew what was coming and barely had the chance to close his connection to their com-link before Prowl decided he wasn't going to stand the bullying from the Decepticon and began to cry exceptionally loudly.

Jazz turned off his own audio receptors and dove forward when Starscream released the sparkling to clutch his own audios, catching the baby Datsun before he hit the ground, and he rolled to Starscream's feet, knocking him over. The other Autobots weren't immune to the sparkling's cries but seemed to be affected to a lesser degree than the Decepticons who were holding their heads and contorting in pain.

Assuming the sparkling was done with his wailing, the Porsche onlined his receptors once more and stood up, setting a foot on the glass of Starscream's cockpit and his photon rifle aimed to his head. "Touch him again, an' I promise ya deactivation will look like a pleasant prospect compared t'what I'll do t'ya."

Starscream could barely register the words through the static of the com-link. When Jazz bent closer to his face while he delivered his threat, Starscream could merely nod before a little white hand slapped his nose. The dumbfounded Seeker just shot a surprised but indignant glare to the baby Datsun who was giving him his best annoyed glare. If he wasn't in horrible pain at the time, Starscream would have made a snarky comment about Prowl's cuteness.

Starscream-induced crisis averted, the saboteur chuckled softly and pulled away from the fallen Decepticon, nuzzling his baby Datsun gently. "When I said ya could make Megatron beg for mercy with those cries o' yours, I didn't mean it seriously, Prowler."

The sparkling tactician tilted his head in confusion but fluttered his little door wings contently, happy to be in the familiar arms he associated with affection, love and, well-being. "I think the sparklin's gave the 'Cons a run for their money, as humans would say."

"It would appear that way." Inferno wasn't sure what to make out of Ravage almost literally crawling to him to deliver the very happy Red Alert sparkling. "Uh, thanks, I guess." The fire engine picked up Red Alert carefully and watched the black cassette trot a few steps towards Megatron's seat and go limp right there, energy spent.

"Someone just take -him- away from me. Now." Megatron's voice sounded tired and grumpy. He was in pain, he was tired, and Perceptor was back to nibbling on him with those annoying kissing sounds all over his head. "Just take your infernal sparklings away. Go away, and let's pretend this never happened."

Under different circumstances, he would first fry the baby Cybertronians in a cauldron filled to the brim with bubbling hot oil before just handing them back to the Autobots. Right now, the cauldron of bubbling hot oil sounded more appealing than standing the Autobot sparklings another minute.

Optimus Prime managed to hold back a chuckle and reached to remove Perceptor from Megatron's head and turned to his troops carefully, knowing better than to lower his guard in Decepticon territory. "We've got all the sparklings, and it seems Megatron and his forces have other priorities to attend to. Autobots, let's go back home."

Megatron watched the Autobots retreat and rubbed the bridge of his nose. The mother, father, and grandmother of headaches were currently dancing the Macarena in his main processors. "Where the slag is Hook?!"

Thundercracker heaved and sigh and set Skywarp down carefully. , He made his way to Megatron and helped him up, leading the Decepticon leader to the medical bay of the Nemesis. "Thundercracker to Hook, do you copy?"

"Hook here. I told Soundwave I'd be there in two more cycles."

"Can it, Hook. We have a severe medical emergency in here. Unless you want to tell Megatron why he has to wait four more Earth hours to receive medical attention?" Thundercracker snorted humorlessly at the litany that followed. What was it with medics and their grumpy behavior?

* * *

The Autobots weren't completely certain what to make of the whole ordeal that had just transpired with the Decepticons. They weren't even sure whether to feel enraged for what had happened or feel sorry for the Decepticons.

"Wheeljack, is there any progress about the situation of the sparklings?" Prime asked while the engineer worked on Mirage to force his transformation back to robot mode.

"I have a few clues, but I don't think I can turn them back to normal, yet." Wheeljack scratched his head for a moment before he manipulated Mirage's transformation cog, prompting the transformation of the racing car back into the blue and white sparkling. "At least, I think we won't have to worry about the Decepticons for a while."

All the Autobots present laughed softly, just happy to have their sparklings back and safe.


	10. Let's do the Dino Warp Again!

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 10 – Let's do the Dino Warp Again!  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Let's do the time warp again! Take a big guess about who is starring in this chapter!

Wheeljack groaned heavily, trying to work through the babble of Grimlock and Slag and trying to filter out the ongoing discussion between the colossal Autobots. Whose idea was it to let them come over when they still had sparklings running around?

The engineer had had a streak of great progress to return the officers back to their adult states, finally figuring out how the Autobots had been turned into sparklings. However, his progress was stalling on the 'return them to adults' front, and Grimlock and company's return from a training session on their island only made things worse.

Grimlock would never openly admit it, but he had a penchant for hanging around Wheeljack whom he considered the closest to a parental figure. At least he wasn't calling him a 'mommy' or 'daddy'... yet.

Trailbreaker was doing his best to keep up with his bodyguard duties in the presence of the Dinobots. Grimlock and Slag were a little too possessive of Wheeljack's attention when they were in his lab. Though, looking at it in a positive light, their presence also kept Sunstreaker far, far away from the engineer.

"Me Slag need drink!" Slag pushed past the Dinobot commander and squeezed Trailbreaker against Wheeljack as he made his way out of the engineer's lab. Under different circumstances, Trailbreaker would berate the other Autobot for his carelessness, but he knew better than to argue with a Dinobot. That didn't make the position he was left in any less mortifying.

"Sorry, Wheeljack." The black mech pushed himself away from the engineer.

"Don't mention it." Wheeljack chuckled and pushed his bodyguard out of the way again when Grimlock decided Slag's idea wasn't a bad one and followed suit.

"You know," Trailbreaker mused. "Maybe you should install some blinkers on their afts."

It took a few moments for the words to sink in before the current occupants of the lab burst out laughing, the image of directional lights flashing on the respective posteriors of each Dinobot displayed clearly in their processors.

* * *

Blaster winced visibly when the Dino-brigade came stomping, quite literally, into the recreation room. He nudged Eject to gather the sparklings together, deciding he didn't want any of them anywhere near potential spots where the Dinobots could step on them either willingly or by accident.

Before Eject could even reach Red Alert and Prowl, Grimlock approached and grabbed the baby Datsun by his tiny police lights, bringing him up to level with his face. "Him Prowl got smaller." With the finesse that characterized him, the Dinobot commander turned the sparkling around with a light twist of his massive wrist to look the sparkling over before he brought him back face to face. "Hah! It look you not big and bossy no more!"

Far be it for the baby Datsun to be scared or afraid of the towering mech -- though the same couldn't be said of Red Alert who was hiding behind Blaster now; Prowl instead glared at him with his best, cutest annoyed expression. The sparkling wasn't one bit happy about being forcefully removed from his playground.

"Er, Grimlock, you should put him down." Blaster winced again and covered the audio receptors of Perceptor and Red Alert while Rewind and Eject did the same with Sideswipe and Mirage as precaution. Even the Autobots had grown to fear Prowl's tantrums, even if he had yet to cry out as loud and painfully since their run with the Decepticons.

"Why? Him Prowl is little mech now. Little mechs can't harm big mech like me Grimlock."

Anyone familiar with Prowl's door wing language, namely Jazz, Bluestreak, or Smokescreen, would have warned Grimlock when the sparkling's wings straightened and moved up, forming an almost V shape with the appendages. Jazz learned that, when Prowl's wings raised that way as a sparkling, it was a warning for whoever was upsetting him or threatening him.

Of course, Grimlock had absolutely no mastery in the fine art of 'door wing lingo'. Prowl's frown deepened, deciding he didn't like the tone the Dinobot was using to talk to him and, with his warning disregarded, tossed the colored block he was holding at the time he was picked up.

The modified data pad hit Grimlock's visor and bounced off him unceremoniously, and the recreation room fell into an awkward silence for almost a whole minute before Grimlock's booming voice filled the room with laughter. "Him Prowl may be little, but him has temper!"

"You have no idea," Blaster grunted, praying to Primus the T-Rex would put the sparkling down before Prowl decided to show him just how much of a temper he had.

The Dinobot brought the sparkling close until his little nose was brushing against the T-Rex's mask. "Him got guts now, too."

The baby tactician was getting tired of hanging from his police lights, it was uncomfortable, and it hurt, and he wanted down right now. He slapped the Dinobot's face mask to show his disgust with his current situation, wanting to be put down so he could resume his playing. But all he got from Grimlock was a second round of amused, condescending laugher. Oh, the Dinobot was just asking for it.

Blaster powered his optics down and braced himself and the sparklings in his lap and waited for what he knew as about to come. On cue, the sparkling Prowl began to cry very, very loudly right in Grimlock's face.

All things considered, the Datsun didn't cry nearly as hard as he did with the Decepticons, but the sounds were no less unpleasant, especially to Grimlock who arched his back to put as much distance between his audios and the wailing sparkling. His equilibrium faltered for a moment, and soon enough, the Dinobot landed painfully on his back with Prowl still hanging from his lights.

"That hurt!" the Dinobot growled angrily at the baby Datsun. "Me Grimlock can crush you Prowl with one hand, you know?"

"Woah, woah! Hold it right there, Mechzilla!" Jazz darted into the room and made a run for his stuck-as-sparkling mate, prying him from the other mech's massive hand. "What the slag's goin' on here?" The saboteur looked from Prowl to Grimlock and then back to Prowl.

The baby Datsun's pouty frown seemed to scream 'he started it!', and Jazz couldn't help but melt at how cute Prowl was when he was pouting. "Well?" Jazz glared back at the fallen Dinobot.

"Him Grimlock picked him Prowl up and didn't want to put down," Swoop supplied and moved to help his commander up. "Maybe now him Grimlock will listen next time him Blaster asks to put him Prowl down."

Grimlock grumbled and cursed lowly but accepted Swoop's help to stand back up, allowing a soft growl to rumble in his throat when the Pteranodon rubbed the joints of the 'wings' formed by his chest in T-Rex form. "Him Prowl not as harmless as me Grimlock thought."

"Trust me, Grimlock. If there's someone that's not harmless as a sparklin', that someone's Prowl," Jazz chuckled softly and nuzzled said sparkling's head gently, rubbing his sore police lights and producing that characteristic fluttering of his door wings.

"Is everything alright?" Bluestreak peeked into the room. "I heard Prowl crying, and I thought we were under attack again."

"Nah, everything's cool, Blue." Blaster waved his hand dismissively and chuckled when Sideswipe made a squealing sound and reached out for the gunner. Not one to deny his lover's twin a little attention, Bluestreak grinned and headed for the playpen, picking the red Lamborghini and ticking him under his chin. "Hey there, miss me?"

Jazz watched with fond amusement and couldn't help but chuckle softly. "Ya're gettin' good at this parentin' business, Blue."

"Y-You think?" the gunner felt the plating of his cheeks growing hotter but smiled and continued to tickle Sideswipe who voiced his appreciation of the affections through happy clicks and squirming little body.

"Yep." Jazz nodded and snorted softly when he felt a familiar little hand grabbing his nearest finger to nibble on it. "Ya know, Prowler, you 'n' me are goin' to have to have a talk 'bout this nibblin' habit o' yours."

Prowl merely looked up to Jazz for a moment before he resumed his suckling and nibbling of his favorite saboteur's finger.


	11. Datsun Impossible

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 11 – Datsun Impossible  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Jazz tasks Smokescreen and Bluestreak with a special mission.

"Smokescreen, Bluestreak, report t'the command room immediately for a special assignment." Jazz smiled and bounced Prowl in his lap, chuckling with amusement at the happy smile on his baby Datsun's face who was enjoying the motion.

"Smokescreen and Bluestreak reporting. What do you need us for, Jazz?" Smokescreen asked at the same time he and Bluestreak came into the room.

"I've got a special mission for the two of ya." The saboteur turned around in his seat. Bluestreak couldn't help himself and smiled to the sparkling strategist who reciprocated the gesture with a clumsy wave of his own.

"What is it?" Smokescreen covered his mouth with his hand, hiding the smile that crept to his lip components at the sight.

"Well, gentlebots, your mission, should ya choose to accept it --not like ya have a choice anyway-- is t'sparklin'sit Prowl while Ironhide an' I are on a diplomatic visit on Portland." Jazz grinned when his announcement was rewarded with a look of utter terror from the diversionary strategist.

"What?! Why us?!"

"'Cause Blaster is attendin' a convention with Wheeljack 'bout telecommunications. Ratchet's got his hands full with Perceptor and 'Sides, an' Inferno can barely keep up with Red Alert. Needless t'say Hound has a Mirage ta look after," Jazz replied matter-of-fact, still bouncing his stuck-as-sparkling mate.

"But why us? Don't get me wrong, I like Prowl as much as the next mech but I don't know slag about sparklings." Smokescreen's door wings drooped visibly. Prowl tilted his head and pulled his own door wings down, mimicking the older of the other two Datsuns.

"Because the two of ya are th'only ones off duty right now that can look after him." The saboteur grinned and held the sparkling up. "An' he likes ya, too!"

Prowl looked at Bluestreak who was smiling, looking more enthusiastic about the task ahead than Smokescreen. The baby Datsun straightened his little door wings to match Bluestreak's this time, prompting a chuckle from the gunner who waved at him again and smiled, mouthing words he wasn't speaking.

Smokescreen sighed in defeat, pouting visibly though it didn't last long when he saw Prowl tried to imitate him again. "Fine, fine. We'll take care of him. How long are you going to be gone?"

"'Bout three cycles. We should be back before night time." The Porsche smiled and nuzzled Prowl before he stood up to hand him to his sparkling sitters, subspacing his ration of special energon which he handed to Bluestreak. "I gotta go, Prowler. Be good to Smokie an' Blue, 'kay?"

Prowl hugged the saboteur's face before he was handed to Smokescreen and waved to Jazz as he was carried away by them.

"What exactly are we supposed to do with him, now?" The diversionary strategist fixed his hold on the sparkling tactician who was apparently having the time of his life poking and prodding his shoulder mounted cannons.

"Just look after him, entertain him, and feed him." Bluestreak was thankful he had at least a little more experience after helping Sunstreaker look after his sparkling twin, Sideswipe. "Right now, I think it's about time for his first ration of energon. Then we can take him to the recreation room and probably sit to watch a movie."

"All right."

* * *

"Primus! It's only been an hour and a half and I'm already bored out of my mind." The blue Datsun threw his arms into the air in exasperation. Prowl watched him do this and threw his own arms up into the air. "Stop picking up on my bad habits, Prowl. Jazz is going to hand my tailpipe back to me if you start going to gamble at night."

"It wasn't that bad of a movie." Bluestreak picked Prowl up and bounced him on his leg, smiling down at the sparkling who fluttered his door wings contently.

"I'm just not used to sitting here and doing basically nothing," the diversionary strategist groaned and rubbed his face.

"Well, if that's the problem I know of something we can do. Plus, I'm sure Prowl would appreciate the change of scenery, and quite frankly, I could definitely go for a ride right now." The gunner smiled down to Prowl and hovered his fingers around for the tactician to play with.

"Anything to get me out of this place."

"All right, hold him for a klik while I get everything ready." Bluestreak handed the sparkling to the older Datsun and vacated the room, mumbling to himself about things he needed to get ready.

Shortly after, the marksman returned with Skyfire in tow and a large sheet draped over his arm. "All set, let's go!"

"Where are we going?" Smokescreen turned the TV screen off and followed after Bluestreak and Skyfire.

"We're going on this thing humans call a picnic." Skyfire transformed into his jet mode, allowing the three Datsuns to come onboard. "You know where to, Skyfire."

"Roger."

"A picnic?" Smokescreen took a seat and secured the sparkling Prowl against him, taking one of the seats closer to the glass of Skyfire's canopy to allow the sparkling to see outside. "And where exactly are we going?"

"Yep, a picnic. Now, you're not allowed to tell this to anyone lest you want Sunstreaker to give you a piece of his mind the painful way; but sometimes we like to spend time together away from the base." Bluestreak began to explain where they were heading and about the picnics he and Sunstreaker had in said location. Of course, he made sure to leave out other bits of information about the activities that occurred that were private.

"I have to admit I never thought Sunstreaker would be the kind for romantic picnics on the beach." The diversionary strategist smiled down to Prowl. "You're sure he won't get pissed about you taking me there?"

"Nah, I told him where I was going and with who."

"Good enough for me."

After a few more minutes, Skyfire landed on a large beach of fine, golden sand. "We're here, Bluestreak."

The young gunner thanked the jet and climbed down, rushing to inspect the area in search for the perfect place to set up their picnic. While the younger Datsun worked on that, Smokescreen walked towards the sea, sitting down on the section of the beach that was caressed by the waves. "Ahh, now that feels good on the plating. Wanna try, Prowl?"

The sparkling looked up to Smokescreen when he was addressed before he looked down to the salty water that washed gently against the blue Datsun's frame. Smokescreen smiled and set Prowl down next to him, keeping a firm hold of his middle to make sure no wave would drag the sparkling into the sea.

Prowl jumped a bit when his little aft was grazed by the warm sand but adjusted quickly and enjoyed the foamy touch of the sea water on his feet. The blue Datsun chuckled softly, watching the sparkling tactician's door wings move up and down gently. Up when the water touched him and then down when the waves retreated.

Through the course of the next hours, the trio played in the sand. Bluestreak helped the sparkling to build a sand castle while Smokescreen allowed his legs to be buried by the curious sparkling. By the time dusk began to fall, the three of them were covered with sand that stuck to their plating and some that sneaked into the seams and crevices of their armors. Bluestreak could already hear the complaints he was going to get from Sunstreaker and the subsequent order to go get himself washed and all the sand extracted if he wanted to be allowed into the golden Lamborghini's berth.

Skyfire flew the three Datsuns back to the Ark in time to greet Jazz and Ironhide who looked worn out after attending to Prowl's duties.

"What the slag happened to you three?" Ironhide raised an optic ridge at the sand-covered Datsuns.

"We went to the beach to have a picnic. If you excuse me, I have sand in some really uncomfortable places, and I'd like to get rid of it before I recharge. I've got patrol duty tomorrow." Smokescreen smiled and handed Prowl to Jazz before he left for the wash racks.

"Seems someone had a fun time." Jazz smiled and cradled the sparkling against his chest plate, rubbing his little police lights. Prowl looked content but also thoroughly exhausted. "Better go get us washed, have some energon, an' hit the berth. Thanks for watching over him, Blue."

"No problem, Jazz. That was fun." The gunner stretched and waved to the retreating black and white pair. "I think I should get a good wash too before Sunny blows a gasket. See you around, Ironhide."

Ironhide nodded and watched Bluestreak head into the ark, shaking his head. "Kids these days." With a soft chuckle the red van headed into the Ark as well.


	12. Smooth Ambulance

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 12 – Smooth Ambulance  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: First steps and first words, oh my!

Blaster had hoped Wheeljack would have found the way to revert the sparklings back to adult Autobots before this happened, but unfortunately for the Communications Officer, the sparklings apparently learned pretty fast when they wanted to.

Blaster watched carefully as the sparkling Perceptor took a couple of wobbly steps before he plopped onto his little aft on the ground, clicking happily at his accomplishment. He had been the first to attempt to stand on his own and take his first steps, but it didn't take long for the other sparklings to follow his example.

Sideswipe was having the easiest time giving little steps and could walk a good ten steps before he lost his balance and fell on his aft. Mirage came a close second, able to take a couple of steps before he lowered himself to a sitting position far more gracefully than the red baby Lamborghini.

All sparklings were able to take a few steps before their little legs gave up – all but Prowl. Blaster couldn't help but feel bad for the baby Datsun. He had the hardest time standing straight, and he couldn't take more than a step before the weight of his door wings pulled him back and made him fall. Thankfully for the baby tactician, Eject and Rewind were always nearby and caught him every time.

That did little to ease Prowl's predicament. All his sparkling friends were walking, and he was stuck crawling because he couldn't stand straight to save his aft.

The new development of the sparklings had the full attention of most of their mates and caretakers who, in Blaster's opinion, were behaving just like proud human parents with their offspring.

Hound spent every free moment he had with the sparkling Mirage and held his little hand to help him walk around the recreation room. Inferno was getting a kick out of playing that 'come to my arms' game with Red Alert. Ratchet and Ironhide played a similar game with little Perceptor taking his wobbly steps from red van to ambulance back and forth. Bluestreak and Sunstreaker walked around holding Sideswipe's little hands and sometimes allowing the sparkling to swing from their hands when he'd get tired of walking.

And Prowl... well, Prowl was stuck in the playpen with Blaster and his cassettes. Jazz didn't have nearly as much free time as the other 'bots since he was currently covering for most of Prowl's duties in addition to his work as head of Special Operations which was down one key mech in the already pretty small squad. All things considered, Prowl was a very unhappy sparkling at that very moment.

Every now and then, the baby Datsun attempted to stand up again to try to join the fun of the walking sparklings, but the enterprise always ended the same way --with him falling on his back after attempting the first step.

Sulking, the sparkling crawled into Blaster's lap where he intended to take a nap until all the sparklings and their glorious first steps would be gone. But before he could even get comfortable in the larger mech's lap, the familiar form of his favorite saboteur came into the room, looking tired but beaming that familiar pleasant smile.

Prowl immediately held his little arms out for the Porsche, and Jazz grinned as he complied. "Hi there, baby. Havin' fun?"

"I think he's beyond frustrated right now." Blaster chuckled, watching the baby Datsun curl against Jazz's chest plate and reach for his finger for comfort. "Poor little guy can't stand straight, let alone take a step."

"Aw, I'm sorry, baby." Jazz nuzzled the sparkling Prowl's cheek lovingly, stroking his little police lights soothingly. "Ya'll get it right sometime; don't worry."

Jazz set the sparkling down and held his little hands to help him balance himself before he let go and encouraged him to take a step. Prowl did so and immediately fell back though this time he managed to fall onto his aft. Upset about his continued failures the sparkling did the only thing he could at the moment.

"Slag!" he cursed.

Every Autobot in the recreation room stopped cold and turned their optics to the sparkling tactician. "Prowl? Did ya just speak?" Jazz gasped and picked up the sparkling.

"I think he just cursed, Jazz," Hound chuckled softly. Of all things he could expect to be Prowl's first word, the Cybertronian curse was certainly not one of them.

"So I heard!" the saboteur laughed softly and nuzzled the sparkling's cheek once more. "Now, now, no cursin', Prowler. Ya're too little to be sayin' those bad words, 'kay?"

"Jass!" Prowl pointed to the Porsche and stretched to reach the object of his desire --Jazz's finger. "Jass!"

Jazz's grin was threatening to take over his whole face, handing his finger to the sparkling as reward for speaking his name. "Ya're a competitive little sparklin' aren't ya?"

"Jass!"

* * *

Over the course of the evening, Jazz spent the whole time teaching Prowl the names of the bots around them, devising a little game that seemed to entertain Prowl thoroughly. "An' who are those, Prowler?"

"Bwasta, Steja, Jec, Rewin!" Prowl pointed his little white finger towards each mech while he called the names.

"An' him?" the saboteur pointed towards the Autobot leader sitting next to them.

"Oppymus Pwime!"

"Close enough," Optimus Prime laughed softly, watching with fond amusement the baby Datsun trying to pronounce names. Considering he just started to speak a few hours ago, his progress was amazing.

"What's my name, Prowl?" Wheeljack asked, waving to the sparkling.

"Weejack!"

"What're their names, Prowler?" Jazz asked again pointing to the other sparklings.

"Raj, Red, Cepter!"

"And them?" Jazz then pointed to the table across their own, where Bluestreak, Sideswipe, and Sunstreaker were sitting.

"Bwustweek, Sider!"

"You forgot him, Prowler. What's his name?" Jazz pointed towards Sunstreaker who was sipping on an energon cube.

Prowl tilted his head and scratched his head in a motion similar to what Jazz would do when he was confused before he apparently remembered the name of the golden Lamborghini. "Slagger!"

Sunstreaker spit the mouthful of energon he just downed right into Bluestreak's face, much to the sparkling Sideswipe's delight who clapped his hands amused. "What the frag are you teaching him, Jazz?!"

"I didn't do it!" Jazz held his hands up, looking as shocked as Sunstreaker himself. "Prowl, that ain't his name, baby. It's Sunstreaker. Sun-streaker."

Prowl tilted his head again and looked up at Jazz then back to Sunstreaker. "Slagger?"

The Porsche let his head hang in defeat. "Where did ya hear all these cuss words?"

"All right, where is that Pit spawned slagger Sunstreaker?!" Ratchet stomped into the recreation room, looking ready to personally reformat said Lamborghini with his bare hands.

"Hashet!" Prowl pointed to the red and white CMO.

"Guess that answers my question," Jazz chuckled softly and waved his hand dismissively when Ratchet raised an optic ridge at him.

"Primus, Ratchet, you're tryin' to teach the squirt all the curses of the Cybertronian language?" Ironhide chuckled softly, holding Perceptor by his middle while the sparkling sat on the table, playing with his cubes.

"Eynhide!" Prowl pointed to the weapons specialist who chuckled and tipped his helm at the sparkling. "That'd be me."

"What the slag are you guys talking about?" Ratchet crossed his arms over his chest plate and addressed a questioning look towards the saboteur.

"Prowl keeps callin' Sunstreaker 'slagger'," Jazz supplied with a soft chuckle.

"Ain't that the truth." Ratchet smiled. Sunstreaker merely groaned and helped Bluestreak to clean his face.


	13. Inferno Be Good

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 13 – Inferno Be Good.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: It's Inferno's turn to sparklingsit!

"No."

"Please?"

"No. No. No. No. Let me say it just once more: no!" Inferno crossed his arms and stomped his foot for extra emphasis. "I'm not goin' anywhere with all of them! The others will have my platin' if anythin' happens to them! Besides, I don't think Prime will be too happy about takin' the sparklings to the human city." The fire engine pointed at the group of sparklings playing happily in the playpen.

"I promised I would be there for the inauguration, and I can't leave Eject and Rewind alone with them now that they can take some steps," Blaster explained as calmly as he could, ignoring the nibbling on his foot courtesy of Sideswipe.

"'Furnoh!"

"Ya should have thought about that before accepting that invitation!" Inferno ignored the sparkling Datsun who was trying to get his attention. "I ain't goin' anywhere with all five of them. I can barely keep up with Red!"

"'Furnoh!"

"But you're not going to be alone! You're just going to help Eject and Rewind." Blaster, too, ignored Prowl's calls. "I wouldn't ask you if anyone else was available. Please, Inferno!"

"'Furnoh!!"

Prowl frowned and watched the adult Autobots, too involved in their discussion to pay him attention. The baby Datsun turned his attention back to Red Alert who had managed to sneak away from the playpen and was heading for the bar area of the recreation room on wobbly steps.

The stuck-as-sparkling tactician looked back to Inferno and Blaster who were still discussing, and the raising volume of their discussion only meant things were getting worse. Frustrated and annoyed, Prowl gave a quick glance around the pen. , Sideswipe was still happily nibbling on Blaster's foot, Eject was busy keeping up with Mirage, and Rewind was busy with Perceptor.

With no capable cassette to attend to his calls, Prowl crawled to his pile of blocks, grabbed one, crawled back to Blaster's feet, and tried to call Inferno once more. When his calls, once again, were ignored, the sparkling tactician took aim and tossed the block as hard as his little arm would allow.

"I'm not goin', Blaster – deal with --ooff!" The fire engine rubbed his nose where the block hit him and turned to glare to whoever threw the offending item at him. "What the slag, Prowl?"

Prowl glared at him with an adorably annoyed frown of his own and pointed towards the bar area. "Red!"

Inferno looked over to where the baby Datsun was pointing and immediately scrambled after Red Alert who was trying to climb one of the stools. "Frag damn it, Red!" The fire truck picked up the sparkling hurriedly and scolded the baby Lamborghini.

"Frag!" Prowl cried and threw his little arms up just like he had seen Smokescreen do many times before.

"For Primus' sake, Prowl, stop cussing!" Inferno groaned as he made his way back to the playpen but kept Red Alert in his arms, not trusting the adventurous little Countach to stay within the pen.

"If Jazz asks, I'm not taking the blame." Blaster crossed his arms and grinned mischievously.

"You're not tryin' to blackmail me are ya?"

Blaster's grin grew wider.

"Fine! I'll go with ya." Inferno huffed angrily and sat Red Alert on his shoulder though he kept a hand around his middle to make sure he wouldn't fall.

"Eject, Rewind, gather the sparklings. We're off to the inauguration of that '50s cafe!" The orange mech smiled happily and finally deigned Sideswipe with his attention, picking up the sparkling gently by his middle.

Eject picked Prowl up and followed Blaster and Inferno out with Rewind in tow.

Once outside the Ark, Inferno handed Red Alert to Rewind and transformed, allowing Blaster and the cassette twins to sit on the roof of his cab with the sparklings in their arms. "Hold on tight!"

The drive to the city was relatively peaceful; the sparklings enjoyed the ride, and admittedly, Inferno actually felt quite happy he was able to make the sparklings happy with the trip.

When the group finally reached the city, he followed Blaster's directions to reach the cafe where he was the special guest who would inaugurate the establishment. A large crowd was already awaiting the guest of honor whose triumphant entrance prompted the collective cheering of all present.

Blaster hopped down from Inferno's roof and handed the sparkling Sideswipe to his cassettes while he made his way to the doors of the cafe where he greeted the owner and stood aside to allow the human to begin his inauguration speech.

Shortly after, the human handed a large pair of scissors to the towering orange mech. Blaster took hold of the ribbon blocking the doors and cut it, officially opening the establishment for business.

After the round of cheering and applause, Blaster followed the owner inside with Inferno, Eject, and Rewind close behind. The cafe was pretty large and had a very tall ceiling which allowed Blaster and Inferno to move around comfortably without having to bend or crouch.

The owner pointed to a large stage set up for a band to play there, probably during the nights. The communications officer took that as his cue and rushed to the stage, plugging the larger speakers into one of his jacks and transformed, 'blaring the tunes' he prepared the night before.

Inferno sat close by but away enough from the stage, keeping Red Alert and Sideswipe sitting in his lap while Rewind and Eject took advantage of their smaller size and occupied a table next to Inferno, setting Prowl, Mirage, and Perceptor on the table so the sparklings could watch the humans dancing.

After a few songs, Inferno felt something on his leg and looked down to see Red Alert bouncing on his little aft at the rhythm of the music. "And here I thought ya didn't like to dance, Red."

Red Alert looked up to Inferno and flailed his little arms, clicking happily as he tried to stand up on the fire engine's legs so he could bounce like the humans were.

"Hey guys, think you could look after Sideswipe for a moment?" Inferno handed the red sparkling twin to Blaster's cassettes and set Red Alert down on his little feet while he sat on his legs and took hold of the sparkling security director beginning to lead the baby Lamborghini as if they were dancing.

The other sparklings watched with interest. Prowl fluttered his wings almost to the beat of the music, swaying his upped body from side to side, merely 'feeling the rhythm'. Sideswipe, Mirage, and Perceptor were swaying as well, clapping and clicking happily.

A couple of songs later, Red Alert decided he had enough and flopped to the ground, crawling to curl on Inferno's lap. "I think we should get goin'. Red looks ready for some energon and a good recharge."

"Blaster should be done soon." Rewind began to gather the sparklings. Sideswipe was already in recharge. Perceptor was using the red twin as a pillow, and Mirage looked thoroughly annoyed by now, still awake but definitely running low on energy. Prowl didn't look sleepy at all though. He was too busy pulling paper napkins out of the silvery dispenser placed against the wall.

When the last song died down, Blaster transformed again and bid a good evening to the crowd, hopped down the stage, and headed for the exit. Inferno and the cassette twins followed --after Eject managed to pry Prowl away from the napkin dispenser.

* * *

"Man, why are human ambassadors so borin'?" Jazz groaned and walked into the recreation room with Ironhide, Bluestreak, Sunstreaker, Hound, and several minibots.

"Beats me, Jazz. I don't know how Prowl can handle these guys." Ironhide headed straight for the energon dispenser, knowing Perceptor was more than likely already recharging in his and Ratchet's quarters.

"Jass!" Prowl, who was still online, threw his arms up in the air again.

"Hey there; miss me?" Jazz grinned tiredly and headed for the play pen to pick up his stuck-as-sparkling mate. "Had fun today?"

Prowl tilted his head and patted the saboteur's face.

"Thanks for lookin' after him, Blaster." Jazz gave a high five to the orange mech. "Hope ya didn't miss that inauguration."

"Nah, Inferno helped me to look after them. I think he had a good time, too." Blaster pointed towards one of the couches at the other end of the room where Inferno was laying down, soundly in recharge with Red Alert laying on his chest also in recharge. Jazz chuckled.

"So, got me a souvenir, Prowler?" Jazz asked as he began to carry his sparkling Datsun away.

Prowl looked at him curiously and plucked something from a small crevice around his neck which he handed to the Porsche. "Nakkin'?"

Jazz raised an optic ridge behind his visor and accepted the offered diminutive piece of paper. "Very thoughtful of ya, baby," Jazz chuckled and nuzzled the sparkling's cheek, carrying him to his room. He'd have to ask Blaster or Inferno about that napkin some other time.


	14. The Young and the Rechargeless

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 14 – The Young and the Rechargeless.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Prowl discovers a room late at night can be very boring when you're a developing sparkling.

Back on Cybertron, things such as day and night were non-existent, and recharge periods were dictated merely by an internal chronometer, marking the duration of the orn and suggesting the appropriate time for recharge.

On Earth, however, Autobots and Decepticons alike learned to adapt themselves to the same internal clock the dominant species followed according to the day and night cycles provided by the sun and the rotation of the planet. Thus, when night time came, most Autobots fell into the slumber known as recharge.

Cybertronians, however, weren't much different from humans in regards to problems to enter or remain in that state of rest to replenish their systems of energy and maintenance of their inner functions. It wasn't common, but it did happen from time to time.

This night, however, it was but one tiny Cybertronian who was unable to remain in recharge, a fact that was already annoying the little Datsun.

Prowl sat up, using Jazz's hood to support himself when the baby Datsun pried himself away from the Porsche's arms. Jazz usually recharged on his back against the berth when he was the only occupant, but every now and then, he would switch positions and lay on his side as he did when Prowl, as adult, was sharing the bunk with him.

That often trapped the stuck-as-sparkling tactician in the Porsche's embrace. Normally, Prowl would recharge peacefully even when in that position, but tonight , the sparkling tactician couldn't recharge. He kept on-lining every few minutes. Why? He didn't know. His developing processors just couldn't process what was going on; all he knew was he couldn't recharge, and he was getting uncomfortable in the position Jazz held him.

The baby tactician managed to crawl his way away from Jazz's grasp, and the Datsun looked over to Jazz when the saboteur groaned, moving a little but remained undisturbed otherwise.

Prowl watched the other mech recharging peacefully, and the tiniest hint of something one could only identify as envy, crossed the sparkling's mind. He, too, wanted to be able to get some recharge.

The room was dark and quiet – a bit too quiet for the sparkling's taste. The only light was provided by his own bright blue optics, and while the show of lights he was giving himself, watching his hands illuminated by the blue glow, was amusing, it grew old far too soon.

Prowl crawled over the berth carefully, climbing over Jazz's arm and shoulder to watch the saboteur's face. His visor emitted no light which was a definitive sign of how deeply in recharge he was. Watching the saboteur in his rest also grew boring too soon, and Prowl decided to explore his dark surroundings a little more.

The baby Datsun crawled around the berth, trying to find a way to lower himself to the ground. He peeked over the edge of the berth, his little doorwings rose in awe at the height. Of course, for a sparkling, the distance between the ground and the top of the berth was akin to standing at the top of a two-story house.

Regardless, Prowl was determined to get the slag away from the boring berth. He was restless, and he wanted to do something to entertain himself. Pulling his doorwings back down until they were almost completely tucked behind his back, the sparkling crawled over the Porsche's midsection and then towards the edge of the berth closest to the saboteur's head. Prowl pushed Jazz's arm so it would hang from the berth, and then, doing what he saw Red Alert do when he escaped the playpen, Prowl used Jazz's arm to lower himself as close to the ground as he could.

Unfortunately for him, his motor coordination was still in development, and he lost his grip on Jazz's arm pretty soon, falling all the way down to the ground and landing on his aft before he fell back with a loud thud courtesy of his police lights. That hurt. A lot.

"Slagging gwound!" Prowl glared to the offending ground before he rolled, a task a little more complicated thanks to his doorwings, and got on his hands and knees. His back and aft hurt now, and nobody was around to make them feel better.

Frustrated and sore, the baby Datsun crawled his way around the berth, navigating blindly around the room since he didn't know how to switch his optics to night vision, and, therefore, all he could see was within the range of illumination the glow of his optics could provide.

Sore, tired, grumpy, and extremely bored at the moment, Prowl crawled around in the dark room, finding a faint source of light, coming from the panel containing the lock of the quarters' doors. It was just as dim as the illumination provided by the sparkling's own optics but offered a point of reference for him.

When he made his way to the doors, Prowl heard the faint sounds of a familiar voice and his face brightened, "Eynhide!" Prowl called the older mech, hoping he could ease the pain on his police lights. His calls, however, went unheard, and when the sound of Ironhide's voice died down, Prowl's happy expression turned to one of disappointment, his door wings drooped visibly, and when the sparkling tactician was ready to just give up and cry his frustration, a pair of hands picked him up gently.

"Prowl? What're ya doin' up this late, baby?"

"Jass!" Despite the sleepy slur in the saboteur's voice, Prowl recognized it immediately.

The Porsche smiled at the happy tone in the sparkling's voice and turned some of the lights on. "Can't recharge?" Jazz asked softly, holding the baby Datsun against the curve of his hood though he frowned a little when he took notice of the scratches on Prowl's police lights and proceeded to rub them gently. Prowl demonstrated his appreciation with a soft fluttering of his door wings.

"Don't go runnin' away from the berth now, Prowler. Ya're goin' ta make my servos lock up." Jazz smiled and stroked the back of the sparkling's helm. "Let's get ya some energon an' see if that helps ya get some recharge."

Jazz subspaced Prowl's ration of special energon, retrieving a cube for the sparkling and also retrieving a cube for himself. Jazz headed for the berth with the cubes and sparkling and settled down comfortably, leaning in a half sitting position with Prowl against his hood.

"Let's see what's up on TV, shall we?" Jazz summoned the TV screen and flipped through the channels, looking for something to watch and hopefully lull the restless sparkling into recharge. Once he found something he deemed suitable, Jazz picked the cube containing Prowl's specialized brew, bringing the cube to the sparkling's lip components. Prowl accepted the fluid readily, sipping hungrily.

After feeding Prowl, Jazz turned his attention back to the TV screen watching a late night movie in between sips of energon and stroking Prowl's roof and police lights, soothing the sparkling until he could barely hear the soft purring of Prowl's systems, the sparkling finally falling into recharge. "I believe humans would say somethin' along the lines of 'sleep tight, Prowler'," Jazz sighed and watched the sparkling recharging peacefully at last, and after a while, Jazz himself was deeply in recharge with his stuck-as-sparkling mate in his arms.


	15. Interlude Easter Blaster

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Interlude – Easter Blaster.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Jazz convinces Prime to let him do an Easter event for the sparklings. Totally inspired by Nagi Oki's easter hunt.

"Egg hunt?" Optimus Prime raised a optic ridge at his third in command, who was currently carrying his sparkling Datsun on his arms.

"Yep! Humans do it all th'time, an' the sparklin's would love it! Can we do it, Prime?" Jazz asked with his best pleading face and disarming grin.

The Prime cycled air heavily and rubbed the bridge of his nose, formalities be damned, Jazz knew all he had to do was ask, and Optimus Prime would comply. "Fine, Jazz. You have my permission, just please, keep it... small."

"Yessir!" The Porsche smiled and poked gently Prowl's little nose. "We're gonna have loads o' fun, Prowler." The baby Datsun tilted his head and grabbed the finger poking him, playing with it for a while before taking it into his mouth as he usually did.

Optimus Prime watched the sparkling fondly, it was hard to imagine his second in command as anything but the formal, logical, efficient Prowl.

"Better scram an' get the bots ready for th'hunt!" Jazz pried his finger away from Prowl and saluted his commander before he retired.

Blaster awaited outside of Optimus Prime's office with his cassettes, Eject and Rewind, each holding a sparkling while Blaster carried Sideswipe on his arms. "How did it go?"

"Green light, Blaster," Jazz grinned again and looked up to Blaster's helmet, and his face plates lighted up with something that could only be described as mischief. "Hey Blaster, what do ya know 'bout the Easter Bunny?"

"Huh?"

"Please, tell me these are going to come off," Blaster shot a nasty glare to the pair of fuzzy orange appendages that were being affixed to his existing horns.

"Don't be a cry baby. They'll come off with some solvent and cleaning solution." Wheeljack's head fins glowed with amusement while he assisted the Communications officer to get dressed for the occasion. "You know, we can always attach a tail, too."

"'Jack, my friend, I'm all for wearing the ears, and even a lamp's screen in my head after too much high-grade," the larger orange mech replied mildly and standing as still as he could while said ears were being attached to his helmet. "But you're not going to catch me wearing a bunny tail. Ever."

"Suit yourself, Blaster." Wheeljack chuckled and tugged gently from the orange fuzzy bunny ears to make sure they wouldn't fall. "You're ready to go, Blaster Bunny!"

"Why, thank you, Wheeljack, the Tooth Fairy."

"That's Ironhide." Wheeljack chuckled, imagining himself wearing a pink tutu with glittery wings.

"I'd ask but I'm running late," With a wave and a last glance to his reflection to adjust the bunny ears, Blaster made his way out of Wheeljack's lab towards the recreation room where the festivities would begin.

Gathered in the recreation room were Ironhide, Ratchet, Bluestreak, Sunstreaker, Jazz, Inferno and Hound, along with their respective sparklings. Optimus Prime was also present to officially kick start the egg hunt.

"Lookin' good, Blaster." Ironhide couldn't help himself, chuckling at the 'thumbs up' their Communications Officer addressed at him. Ratchet held out a container modified and decorated to look like a basket. Pilled up inside the container were several energon treats shaped like Easter eggs.

"Bwasta?" Prowl pointed at Blaster with a confused expression, he didn't recall Blaster having those long fuzzy appendages before.

"That's Blaster, the Easter Bunny, Prowler," Jazz grinned, holding the sparkling on one arm and his own basket for Prowl on his free hand.

"Bwasta Bun bun?" Prowl asked and scratched his head, this wasn't making much sense to him.

Optimus Prime cleared his exhaust to get everyone's attention, giving a quick glance around the room to make sure everyone was there. "Thank you, everyone, for joining us today for this Easter Egg Hunt. I'm sure Jazz already debriefed you about this holiday and the purpose behind the egg hunt. So, get your sparklings and baskets ready, the Easter Bunny will begin to hide the eggs on my signal." Optimus nodded for Blaster to scatter around the large recreation room, hiding the egg shaped treats. "Let the egg hunt commence!"

The adult Autobots gathered in the room set their respective sparklings down, handing the baskets to them as they began to guide the sparklings around the room in search for the energon treats.

Sideswipe trotted around the room as fast as he could go, with Sunstreaker and Bluestreak staying close. When he found the first egg he picked it up, looking the odd item over before he cast a questioning glance to Bluestreak.

"Put it on the basket, 'Sides," Bluestreak crouched by the sparkling and took the egg from his tiny hands, setting it carefully inside Sideswipe's basket. The sparkling red twin smiled and clicked happily, quickly looking around for more eggs to put into his basket.

Mirage found an egg of his own and held it up for Hound to take, unsure of what to do with it. Hound smiled and put it on the basket he carried for the baby Ligier, cheating a little and pointing towards one of the couches where he had tracked another treat. Mirage followed his lead in slow but firm steps, and retrieved another energon treat, this time shaped like a bunny, and set it down inside his basket, looking around for more.

Perceptor found an energon treat shaped like a chickie and plopped down in the ground to study this new object. "You gotta get more of these, Perceptor. You can analyze them later," Ratchet chuckled and set the sparkling back on his feet, giving a gentle spank on his little aft to encourage him to get more. Perceptor began to look around for more, but refused to put the chickie he had found already inside the basked Ironhide carried for him.

Red Alert was happily trotting around, holding onto Inferno's hand, dragging his own basket around with his free hand. He stopped when he spotted another treat and chirped happily, releasing Inferno's hand as he rushed on wobbly steps towards the treat, still dragging his basket with him. Inferno smiled proudly when Red Alert trotted back to him, showing his basket's contents to him. "Ya're doin' great, Red. C'mon, let's go find more!" Inferno took the baby Lamborghini's diminutive hand and guided him around the room in search for more treats.

Prowl, despite the disadvantage of having to crawl his way around, caught the purpose of this little game right away and was crawling around the room as fast as he could manage. Jazz chuckled and followed his baby Datsun with his own basket, just watching Prowl's door wings flutter and twitch as he crawled around and found more treats. "Egg!" Prowl called happily whenever he located one, though, he frowned when Sideswipe snatched one of the eggs he had pointed at before the sparkling tactician could make a move for it.

"Gotta keep it quiet, Prowler. Ya don't want th'other sparklin's snatchin' your eggs, now do ya?" Jazz stroked the sparkling's helm gently before putting a finger to his lips, instructing the sparkling to keep quiet. Prowl seemed to understand and covered his lip components with his tiny hands before he crawled away in search of more energon treats.

After a while, when all the treats had been found, Blaster announced the end of the hunt, handing small bundles containing more treats to each sparkling before he bid his goodbye and retreated to get those ears the slag off his head - his horns were getting itchy.

"Well, that was fun." Bluestreak sat down on one of the couches with Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe who was sitting on his twin's lap, nibbling happily on one of the eggs he had retrieved.

"The sparklings got a kick out of that." Ratchet nodded and smiled, watching Perceptor, poke, prod and play with one of the peep shaped treats he found during the hunt.

"Gonna have to keep an eye on how much of these treats they eat or they'll be bouncing off the walls." Hound cradled Mirage on his arm, feeding the sparkling one of the bunny-shaped treats.

"You're tellin' me." Inferno shot a wary look towards Red Alert who was happily nibbling his third treat of the day, sitting on the fire engine's lap, and keeping a death grip on his basket.

Jazz merely chuckled and stroked the back of Prowl's helm, the sparkling was too busy suckling on Jazz's finger to pay much attention to the 'loot' he acquired during the egg hunt, though he kept a vigilant optic on his basket, just in case Sideswipe decided to score an extra egg or two.

"You said they would come off with solvent!"

"Uh oh," Jazz laughed softly and turned to the entrance of the recreation room just in time to see Wheeljack rush past, with an enraged Blaster on his tail, scratching his itching horns.

"Bwasta Bun Bun!" Prowl pointed at the orange blur before he resumed his nibbling on the saboteur's finger. Jazz nodded with an amused expression and held his sparkling Datsun close. "Run, Wheeljack, run. The Killer Blaster Bunny's out to get ya."


	16. The Heat is On, On Smokescreen

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Capter 15 – The Heat is on, on Smokescreen.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Sunstreaker is forced to do that sparkling sitting gig with Bluestreak and Smokescreen... well, kinda.

* * *

There were times Sunstreaker wondered why Primus hated him so much. His first day off in what felt like an eternity, and he was stuck sparklingsitting. That in itself wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for the little fact he was stuck taking care of all five sparklings, and Prowl apparently decided the name Sunstreaker was too hard to learn and continued using the 'affectionate' name Ratchet had for him.

"Why are we going to the city, anyway?" Sunstreaker shifted his tires grumpily while Bluestreak secured Sideswipe carefully into the baby seat Wheeljack had installed in the golden Lamborghini.

"Because there's some materials we have to pick up for Wheeljack so he can build that machine to return the sparklings to normal," Bluestreak replied, his tone matter-of-fact. "Besides, it'll be good for us and the sparklings to go out for a while. We can even pick up some cans of wax for you while we're there. I'll give you a nice and relaxing polish when we're done sparkling sitting – how does it sound?"

If Sunstreaker had been in his robot mode, he would have raised an optic ridge at Bluestreak's offer. "As long as you can find someone to look after Sides while we're doing that."

"Got it covered," Bluestreak said with a small smile and proceeded to secure Red Alert into a temporary second seat Trailbreaker helped to install in Sunstreaker's alternate mode for the evening.

"Fine." The golden twin revved his engine in defeat.

Bluestreak shook his head and chuckled in amusement before he transformed next to his lover, opening both doors to allow Smokescreen to secure the remaining sparklings into the baby seats he was fitted with earlier that day.

Prowl pointed right to the driver's seat, fluttering his door wings and tugging on Smokescreen's bumper excitedly. "Smoskeen! Smoskeen! Der! Der!"

"Copy that, Prowl," Smokescreen laughed softly and set the sparkling tactician in Bluestreak's driver seat, carefully holding him still until the belts wrapped around his little frame. Prowl disliked the belts, but after a few experimental twitches of his door wings, he was satisfied with the amount of movement they allowed and proceeded to reach for the steering wheel, barely touching it with the tips of his diminutive fingers.

Bluestreak bounced a little on his wheels to amuse the sparkling some more before he stilled to allow Smokescreen to maneuver his way into settling Mirage and Perceptor in the back seats --the gunner could be a mellow and gentle Autobot, but even he knew better than to let Perceptor anywhere near his dashboard.

"Sparklings in, secured, and ready to go, gentlebots." Smokescreen dusted his hands off and stepped back to allow the Datsun and Lamborghini so they could take off with their cargo once he, too, transformed.

"You know." Sunstreaker shifted his tires once more. "It just occurred to me we're going to have a little of a problem to get Wheeljack's materials."

"Why do you say that?"

"Hello? Transformation sequence? We're going to make pancakes out of the sparklings if we transform, Blue." Oh, how he wished he could just roll his optics like humans did with their eyes.

"You know, the fact my name is Smokescreen doesn't mean I'm invisible," the racing Datsun grumbled and transformed as well. "I'm coming along."

"So much for a ride together, Bluestreak." The Countach's voice dripped sarcasm.

"Stop being such a pain in the aft, Sunny. I said I'd make it up to you later." The gunner moved close to his lover, touching the Lamborghini's side gently with his bumper, mindful of the other's paint job. Sunstreaker revved his engine again, but this time it was more like a compliant purr.

"Right... I'll get going, now." Smokescreen revved his engine loudly and took off at high speed, intending to leave the 'love birds' behind. His excess of speed, however, didn't go unnoticed by a sparkling Datsun fitted as a police cruiser.

"Bad Smoskeen! Bad!" Prowl frowned and tightened his little fingers around Bluestreak's steering wheel, and his sirens and police lights turned on. "Bad Smoskeen!"

Bluestreak couldn't hold back a snicker and revved his engine loudly. "It seems we ought to chase the law breaker, Sunny. Up for a little race?"

"It'll be a pleasure, Blue, dear." Bluestreak could almost feel the smirk in his lover's voice.

"Hold on tight, guys!" Bluestreak revved his engine once more and sped up after Smokescreen, quickly followed by Sunstreaker. Sideswipe and Red Alert were happily bouncing in their seats, arms up in the air and squealing in delight.

Bluestreak accelerated once they were far enough from the Ark, intending to engage in pursuit of the racing Datsun. Inside Bluestreak's alternate mode, the light show Prowl was unintentionally performing was amusing Perceptor and Mirage greatly. The sparklings were bouncing in their seats, happily enjoying the chase despite the loud noise of Prowl's sirens.

Sunstreaker wasn't about to be undone by Bluestreak and demonstrated why he and his twin were two of the fastest Autobots in their vehicle modes. The Lamborghini sped past Bluestreak, catching a glimpse of the 'law breaker', and with a loud rumble of his engine, accelerated until he passed Smokescreen, quickly positioning himself ahead of the diversionary tactician.

Smokescreen swerved, trying to move past the golden Lamborghini, but he found his way blocked every time. Much to his dismay, Smokescreen found out Bluestreak was at his tail, forming a containment formation with the Lamborghini, and the sounds of Prowl's police sirens did a fine work to inform the diversionary tactician he was in trouble.

"Pull over, Smokey!" Bluestreak chuckled into their com-line, and with Sunstreaker lowering his speed gradually, the racing Datsun had no choice but to slow down to a stop, Bluestreak stopped right behind him.

Smokescreen transformed and knelt by Bluestreak's driver's seat, trying too hard not to laugh at the deep, adorable frown Prowl was addressing at him when the tiny police lights and sirens turned off. "Bad Smoskeen!"

"Sorry, Prowl. I promise I won't do it again." Smokescreen gave the baby Datsun his best pleading expression. Prowl patted Smokescreen's face, apparently 'letting him go with just a warning'.

"I'm going to miss it when they're back to normal. I don't think the adult Prowl would ever let me live it down if he had to chase me down like this. " Smokescreen transformed again and led the convoy once more though this time he made sure to go at a more law abiding speed.

"Not to mention the lecture we'd get from chasing you down with sparklings inside," Bluestreak laughed softly and leveled with Sunstreaker, driving side by side with him the remainder of the way to the city.

Once in the city, the three Autobots headed for the warehouses where they had to pick up the materials Wheeljack required, and after a quick stop to secure a couple of cans of wax for Sunstreaker, the Datsuns and Lamborghini finally set on their way back to the Ark.

After removing the sparklings from Sunstreaker's and Bluestreak's vehicle modes, Smokescreen took the materials to deliver them to Wheeljack, leaving the couple to watch over the sparklings for the rest of the day until their respective mates and caretakers picked them up.

"So," Sunstreaker drawled, bouncing his twin and Red Alert on his legs and watching a movie in the recreation room. "Who is going to look after Sides tonight?"

Bluestreak smiled slyly. "Prime."

Sunstreaker stared at his lover for a few moments before a smirk spread over his lip components. "You're quite an evil mech underneath that lovely face plate of yours, Blue."

Bluestreak's smile widened.


	17. Crazy Little Thing Called Sideswipe

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Capter 16 – Crazy Little Thing Called Sideswipe.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Prime baby sits. Jazz sings. Prowl Lambo Judo-es?

* * *

Optimus Prime paced around his private quarters with his arms behind his back and a wary expression visible in his optics. Every now and then, he stopped his pacing to look back at the large berth on the other side of the room.

There, sitting perfectly still, lay the sparkling Sideswipe who stared at him with big, bright blue optics and the most innocent expression in his little face plates. And it was that precisely which was making the bearer of the Matrix wary and nervous. When Sideswipe was an adult, that kind of expression in his face plates usually meant hell was about to break loose.

In the past, Optimus Prime usually relied on Prowl to help him to try to predict as much of Sideswipe's potential chaos as the red Lamborghini's reckless and mischievous nature could allow. But with Prowl currently stuck as a sparkling, there was no way Prime alone could attempt to decipher the inner workings of the baby Lamborghini's processor.

Prime had agreed to sparkling sit Sideswipe for Sunstreaker and Bluestreak, perfectly aware of why the gunner requested the favor. After all, he was relying on Bluestreak to keep Sunstreaker's temperament in check, and the pair needed some bonding time of their own without the sparkling's interference. That still did very little to calm that little voice in the back of his processors warning him about the strike of mischief and chaos Sideswipe would inflict upon him as soon as he could.

Yet, Sideswipe remained sitting perfectly still and calm, just watching the big red 'bot pacing around and giving no indication he was about to move or do anything -and that was beginning to take its toll in the ever-patient Optimus Prime.

Finally, after nearly pacing a hole in the floor, the Autobot leader decided to request assistance of the only mech he could entrust with this particular mission. "I'm sorry to disturb you, Jazz, but I need your assistance. Please meet me at my quarters. And bring Prowl with you."

When Jazz came into Optimus' quarters, he was expecting to see the Autobot leader suffering under the tender mercies of the sparkling Sideswipe. What he found, however, was his leader sitting cross-legged in front of his recharge berth facing Sideswipe who merely looked back at him with the most innocent expression he could muster. "Uh, Prime?"

"Come on in, Jazz." Optimus motioned for the saboteur to come further into the room.

Jazz did as he was told, fixing his hold on the sparkling Prowl who didn't seem very thrilled to be there so late. Sideswipe then turned to look at Jazz before he clicked happily upon seeing the sparkling Datsun nestled in the saboteur's arms.

"What did ya need?" Jazz smiled down to Sideswipe and stroked the crest on the sparkling's helm. The baby Lamborghini made more happy clicking sounds and maneuvered himself on the bunk to stand up and reach up to Jazz.

"Jazz, I'm a little worried about Sideswipe," Prime explained, standing up without tearing his gaze away from the sparkling.

"Why?"

"Jazz," Prime began and addressed his best confused expression to his third in command. "He is behaving."

If Jazz's horns had any kind of mobility and flexibility of their own, he was certain at least one of them would have flopped down. "An' that's bad?"

"It's Sideswipe. Well-behaved and Sideswipe are two words that just... I can't imagine them in the same sentence." Optimus Prime gave a passing look to Prowl who merely stared back, looking like he just wanted to go back to his recharge cycle with Jazz already. The Autobot leader couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for probably pulling the sparkling out of his rest.

"Dunno what to tell ya, Prime. I haven't dealt with Sideswipe like this. Prowl's a handful enough as it is." Jazz grinned and tickled the sparkling Prowl under his chin, making the sparkling squirm and smile under the assault.

Optimus Prime couldn't help himself and laughed softly, watching the sparkling tactician flutter his wings and squirm in the saboteur's arms while uttering no sound at all.

After the quick assault, Prowl wiggled a bit in Jazz's arms before he caught a glimpse of something primarily red and black slipping down of Optimus Prime's berth. "Siders!" He pointed to the now vacant space in the middle of the berth.

Prime turned around to find the red twin gone and proceeded to slap a hand to his face. "I _knew_ it!" The Autobot leader scrambled to look underneath the berth to see if Sideswipe decided to hide there.

Jazz chuckled and set Prowl down, crouching by the sparkling and brushing a black finger along the length of the right side of the baby Datsun's chevron. "Wanna play a little game, Prowler?"

Prowl tilted his head as if he was considering whether he wanted to play or not before he nodded vigorously.

Jazz smiled and poked Prowl's little nose gently before he stood up and helped Prowl to his feet, holding one of his little hands up to help steady him – it was the only way Prowl was able to take any steps so far. "All right, let's find the missin' Sideswipe before Prime does. Ready?"

Prowl nodded and clung with his free hand to the saboteur's leg, wobbling a little still and fighting with his door wings and center of gravity to stand as upright as he could manage.

The three Autobots could hear Sideswipe's happy clicks as he ran or sneaked around furniture, having too much fun with his little game of hide-and-seek. Jazz noted how fast Sideswipe was even as a sparkling, running around so fast on his little legs that all he could see was little streak of a red blur left in his wake.

Optimus Prime was doing his best to catch the sparkling whenever he darted across the room, but he was so much bigger than everyone in his quarters that he forced himself to be careful and slow down which gave the baby Lamborghini plenty of opportunity to avoid capture. Until the sparkling ran by Jazz and Prowl.

Prowl saw the blur of sparkling coming right at them and barely had the time to disengage his little hand from Jazz's black one and throw himself to the blur, tackling the sparkling and holding tightly onto his legs. Had they been in the air, it would have looked like Prowl was demonstrating his personal brew of Jet Judo.

Sideswipe chirped happily even after he was forced to the ground with Prowl firmly attached to his little legs, finding as much fun in being found and caught as he did running and hiding.

"Seems we got a winner!" Jazz laughed good naturedly and picked up the sparkling Prowl, tugging a little on him to convince him to release his captive. "S'ok, Prowler, ya won. Let Prime take care of the law breaker."

"Bad Siders?" Prowl frowned and looked back to the red sparkling who was currently clicking happily, nestling in Optimus Prime's arms.

"Just a little, but Prime will take care of him," the Porsche smiled and kissed the crest on his baby Datsun's helm. "Ya should give him his energon and put him down for recharge, Prime."

"On it," the larger mech replied and settled Sideswipe down in the container Bluestreak gave him to use as crib for the small sparkling since usually Sideswipe recharged against Sunstreaker's or Bluestreak's chest. Sideswipe clicked softly and accepted the specially graded energon the Autobot leader offered him, wiggling around a little to get comfortable before he addressed an expectant look at Prime.

"Oh, right." Optimus Prime rubbed the back of his neck and glanced over at Jazz who was bouncing Prowl contently in his arms. "Bluestreak said Sideswipe likes to be lullabied."

Jazz chuckled and nodded, understanding the implicit petition. The Porsche took a seat on the berth next to Sideswipe's temporary crib and reached to stroke the side of the sparkling's helm, and he began to sing softly, so softly it could barely be heard by Optimus Prime.

The song was no lullaby at all; in fact, the larger mech identified it as some of that popular music Jazz loved to listen to at outrageous volumes. The cheerful lyrics and tune, however, were doing a great job to lullaby the sparkling, and it didn't take long before Sideswipe was soundly in recharge.

"How do you do that?" Optimus Prime chuckled softly, doing his best to keep his booming voice low enough to not disturb the baby Lamborghini's rest.

"Do what?" The saboteur stood up, fixing his hold on Prowl who was still wide awake.

"How do you turn Rock and Roll into a lullaby?"

"I'm that good, boss-bot," Jazz replied and grinned. "If ya don't need me around anymore, Prowl needs his own energon and a good recharge cycle of his own."

"Of course. Thanks for your help, Jazz. Recharge well, and you too, Prowl." Prime nodded and stroked Prowl's head gently, chuckling when the baby Datsun's door wings fluttered a little in appreciation.

Jazz smiled and bid his leader good night before he headed out with his own sparkling in his arms.


	18. The March of the Medic 'Bot

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Capter 17 – The March of the Medic 'Bot.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Perceptor tests Ratchet's patience when the Doc-bot is already running low. Prowl discovers remote controllers.

* * *

Ratchet grunted, grumbled, and groaned in annoyance and exhaustion. Of all mechs, why was it Sunstreaker or Bluestreak who always, always came to his medical bay after some rather intense... private time with each other? He couldn't begin to fathom how either of the mech's managed to crack something on the other – they were interfacing, not wrestling!

But as images of what the pair could be doing in the privacy of their quarters began to appear into his CPU, he decided to try to focus his attention on fixing the dents Bluestreak was currently sporting in places that were absolutely not appropriate to be seen by other Autobots.

After fixing the dents and applying a layer of primer on the gunner's aft, the medic ordered the Datsun and his lover out of the medical bay with instructions for Bluestreak to drop by first thing in the morning to get his paint touched up. Once they left, Ratchet finished putting away his instruments for the night and headed out towards his and Ironhide's quarters which were close by. He was looking forward to a good cube of energon, possibly some mild high-grade, and a some needed recharge with Ironhide. Little did he know Perceptor had other plans.

When Ratchet reached his and Ironhide's quarters, he was greeted to the sight of Ironhide chasing the sparkling around, trying to pry him from under the berth, the desk, a chair, from behind a shelf he managed to sneak into, rinse and repeat.

"What in Primus' name is going on here?!" Ratchet asked as he watched his mate try to catch the sparkling who looked as if Sideswipe had possessed him or overcharged to the pit and back or a combination of both.

"Hi, Ratchet. Long night at medical?" Ironhide asked cordially, trying to pry Perceptor out from under their berth. "Perceptor got bored tearin' his treats apart an' decided to eat one, then helped himself to half of the slaggin' basket while I wasn't looking!"

"What?!" Ratchet's face was filled pure and absolute terror. This did not bode well for his intended cube of high-grade and recharge in Ironhide's arms. "What the pit were you doing?!" The medic rushed to help his mate to try to capture the sparkling whose systems were in the mother and father of all Cybertronian equivalents of a sugar rush.

"Tracks came to complain about his patrol tomorrow, an' Perceptor decided to swim in the basket while we were arguin' about his patrol partner!" Finally, Ironhide managed to get a hold of the sparkling's foot and dragged him out as gently as possible, holding the twitching baby microscope by his middle. Perceptor looked around excitedly, unable to stay still for more than a second or two. The barrel of his microscope form was constantly twitching around, too, and he was clicking quickly in a way that would be reminiscent of just how quickly Blurr could talk.

Ratchet shook his head and rubbed the bridge of his nose, already fearing the terrible night he and his mate were going to spend. Picking up the basket, Ratchet tried to find out what exactly Perceptor had consumed in an attempt to calculate just how much the sparkling had over energized himself. Three treats of the size they made for Easter were usually the limit, a fourth was pushing it, but with Perceptor apparently consuming eight, Ratchet was certain there would be no rest for him or his mate. Primus have mercy on any mech that came tomorrow to his medical bay without any life threatening injuries, finger-shaped dents in the aft be slagged.

Ratchet pondered the use of a sedative on Perceptor, but he was certain the sparkling's systems would react worse to the sedative than the excess of energy. There were certain times Ratchet wished they had access or equivalents to more 'traditional' healing methods like humans did. A tea to soothe the sparkling sounded very, very tempting at the moment.

"Let's give him a bath and see if that calms him down a little." Ratchet retrieved a basin and headed out of the room towards the wash racks to collect some cleaning solution and a wash cloth.

On his way, he passed by the recreation room where Jazz was sitting in one of the largest couches with the sparkling Prowl in his lap. "What are you two doing up this late?"

"Prime asked me ta help him get Sideswipe rechargin' an' came to grab some energon before goin' back to our quarters, and Prowl found a new toy." Jazz pointed down at Prowl who was playing with the remote controller for the large TV screen in front of them, pressing his little fingers to the many colorful buttons on the black gadget.

"What's with restless sparklings tonight?" Ratchet sighed softly though he smiled fondly when Prowl looked at him curiously, holding the controller in mid air with evident course towards his mouth.

Jazz chuckled and pulled the controller away before Prowl could put it to his mouth, earning an indignant glare from the baby Datsun -he wanted to sample that!

"Sorry, Prowler, but can't let ya eat th'controller. The other 'bots will throw a fit of epic proportions if I let ya ruin it, sparklin' or not." Jazz grinned and patted the sparkling's head affectionately though that only earned him a disappointed look from Prowl who tried, and failed, to cross his arms like he had seen other adult mechs do, his door wings drooped in light of his evident failure.

"He's developing fast, isn't he?" Ratchet couldn't help but laugh. Out of all the sparklings, Prowl was the one picking up the most mannerisms from other mechs, particularly Jazz, Bluestreak, Smokescreen, and Ratchet himself.

"Yeah, though poor 'lil guy's still havin' so much trouble walkin'." Jazz handed the controller back to Prowl, instructing the sparkling to keep it out of his mouth or he'd take it away. Whether Prowl really understood the warning or not, the sparkling decided to just push more colorful buttons and see what would pop on the TV screen.

"He'll get it eventually, though. Wheeljack promised they'd be back to normal in less than a week now." Fixing his hold on the basin, Ratchet waved good bye to Jazz and Prowl. "Gotta go get some cleaning solution to bathe Perceptor. Little pit-spawn over energized himself with those Easter treats."

Jazz winced visibly and addressed a sympathetic look at the medic, or what Ratchet assumed was a look since he couldn't see Jazz's optics in the first place. "Good luck puttin' that mini devil ta recharge, Ratchet," Jazz said softly and waved to the ambulance, laughing a bit when Prowl waved too and returned his attention to the TV screen.

Ratchet gathered the cleaning solution and carried the basin carefully all the way back to his and Ironhide's quarters, half expecting to find the place short of being a zone of disaster. Thankfully, other than Ironhide sporting a crack on his windshield and Perceptor gnawing on his arm, the room and most of its contents were standing in one piece. "What did he do to you?" Ratchet asked and moved further into the room to a small table where he set down the basin and began to gather the items they'd need to bathe the sparkling.

"Kicked me repeatedly," Ironhide muttered, not exactly happy with the idea of needing to replace his windshield so soon after the crystal had been installed.

"Come on, bring him over." The medic pulled out a wash cloth and a brush.

Ironhide did as he was told and managed to settle Perceptor down in the basin, but no sooner had he put the sparkling in, Perceptor decided the 'water' was nice and fun and began to splash around to soak his caretakers. Ratchet heaved a long suffering sigh and ordered Ironhide to entertain the sparkling and keep him as still as possible while he scrubbed him.

By the time the two vans finished, half of the basin's solution was spilled over the floor and the two larger mechs. Ironhide sported a second crack to his already broken windshield and Ratchet experienced a close encounter of the third kind between his optic and Perceptor's microscope's lens. The bath, however, served its purpose somewhat, and the sparkling was far more subdued by the time the bath was over though he was still fully online and with no sign of intending to get some recharge any time soon.

True to the predictions, Perceptor moved around in his temporary crib, sitting up, looking around, clicking, and attempting to escape the crib more times than Ratchet or Ironhide cared to count. Deciding the only way any of them would get any semblance of rest, the medic and weapons specialist decided to take turns to look after the sparkling while the other rested. Deeming Ratchet's rest a priority over his own, Ironhide insisted on taking the first hour turn to watch Perceptor, and the large red van wondered how many cracks he'd sport on his windshield by the time his shift started.

At first, Ironhide thought he could bore the sparkling to recharge by telling him tales of the old days in the same know-it-all tone Kup used back on Cybertron. Unfortunately, that strategy failed horribly, rather than bore Perceptor, it caught his interest, and every time Ironhide intended to stop, the sparkling would pat his face to get him to talk more. At least the sparkling was behaving.

When Ratchet's turn came, the medic didn't bother to try to bore the sparkling and merely rocked him in his arms, occasionally humming something at random while Ratchet read something to keep himself occupied. Perceptor constantly tried to pry the pad away from Ratchet, but the medic always kept it far away from his reach. After a while, Ratchet began to hum a little louder and Perceptor settled for listening to the primarily white mech's voice.

When it was almost time to wake up Ironhide to trade places again, Ratchet felt Perceptor cuddle closer to him, nuzzling against his shoulder and, to Ratchet's surprise, he felt the sparkling give him a hug.

"Maaaammy..." Perceptor said with a smile and then nuzzled better against Ratchet's shoulder, still keeping his grasp around the medic as best as he could and powered down his optics, apparently intending to finally recharge.

"I would seem he thinks yer his 'ma'," Ironhide murmured with a large grin and wrapped his arm around Ratchet's midsection. "Think it's time to hit the berth, Ratch'. Better bring the 'lil guy along tonight."

Ratchet nodded and cast a quick glance to the now definitely recharging Perceptor and set his data pad down on the desk, following Ironhide to their berth with the sparkling nestled against his shoulder. Carefully settling down by his mate, Ratchet moved closer to Ironhide, feeling his arm wrap around him to hold him close and the baby microscope moving a little in his recharging state to settle comfortably in between his caretakers. Ratchet would later admit it had been one of the best recharge cycles he ever had.


	19. Bloody Gears

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Capter 18 – Bloody Gears.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: : Gears is charged with watching over the sparklings for an insignificant hour. (And before anyone goes WTF? about the one-sided apparent pairing, in my defense, I blame the Dreamwave continuity for giving it some semblance of plausibility.)

.

"I shouldn't have left my berth this morning," Gears muttered and looked down at the assortment of sparklings sitting around him the floor of the recreation room. It all began with him going to get his morning energon cube and coming across Bluestreak, who was carrying a recharging Sideswipe. They made some light conversation while Jazz, Hound, Ironhide, and Inferno came in to drop their respective sparklings in the playpen. Blaster wasn't there as he was required to assist Cosmos, and his cassettes were necessary as well.

With all but Inferno stuck on monitor duty or other tasks that didn't require them to leave the Ark, everyone was resigned to look after their respective sparklings, with Bluestreak offering to watch over Red Alert – after all, he had experience with Lamborghinis. Gears would never admit that comment didn't sit well with him.

But then Wheeljack called them over to his lab, and Bluestreak was quick to thrust the recharging Sideswipe in Gears' arms, begging him to take care of him until he was back. Gears just couldn't bring himself to say "no" to the gunner, and no sooner had he agreed to watch over the sparkling, the remaining mechs entrusted their respective sparklings to him.

"One hour tops," they said. And Gears found himself charged with five sparklings who had managed to beat the Decepticons by being unbearable. Gears knew he was in trouble, he just knew it, but he still couldn't say no. No matter what Bluestreak asked, he couldn't say no to the young Datsun.

So, now he was looking down at the sparklings. Sideswipe, Mirage, and Perceptor were still deep in recharge, and Perceptor looked like he wasn't going to online for another three hours at the very least. Prowl and Red Alert were quiet, just looking up at him with curious blue optics. Jazz warned him to keep an eye on Prowl – even if he was well behaved, the sparkling had a penchant for sticking anything he could into his mouth. And Red Alert was known for trying to wander too far in his exploration of his surroundings and affinity to horseback rides. The minibot suspected these two alone would keep him very busy.

Prowl tilted his head up, his doorwings raising up in wonder at this mech he wasn't sure he had seen before, but since Jazz left him with this mech, he was probably safe. The sparkling got to his hands and knees and crawled the small distance to Gears feet, tapping a foot with his little hand to get his attention.

"Yes?" Gears bent a bit to look better at the sparkling but still staring down at him. Prowl wasn't sure he liked this mech who wouldn't bring himself close enough to look at him face to face.

"Who?" Prowl asked curiously tilting his head back some more until he lost his balance and fell backwards. Red Alert chirped and stood up in wobbly legs, taking the few steps to his sparkling friend and looked down at him, chirping worriedly.

Prowl frowned and whimpered but managed to sit back up, glaring angrily at the tall mech for making him fall back and feel sore on his police lights again.

Gears sighed heavily, knelt down to the sparkling's level, and hesitantly reached to stroke the sparkling's head. "I'm Gears," he said with a tight smile.

Prowl tilted his head a little, processing the mech's name and then pointed a diminutive finger to the mech's face. "Gurrs!"

"Close enough." Gears smile widened, and he couldn't help but wonder if Bluestreak was this cute when he was a sparkling. "Jazz is so not going to let you live down your cuteness, Prowl."

"Jass!" Prowl smiled and threw his arms up, forgetting all his sore spots.

"Yes, yes, Jazz." Gears shook his head and carefully picked up the online sparklings, carrying them along to get a couple of energon cubes for the other minibots. It was part of a daily routine he set up for himself – filling up a tray with cubes for all the minibots he knew would be coming to refuel to start their shift. Unlike other 'bots, Gears actually made a point of reading the schedules closely to see which minibots would be on early shifts. It was a nice gesture for which he expected no thanks, and he usually didn't receive many. Cosmos, Bumblebee, Cliffjumper, Seaspray, and Beachcomber were the ones who always thanked his attentiveness, and Brawn on occasion. Anyone else just kind of took the cubes and left with their processors busy with only Primus knew what.

Gears didn't mind. He was used to being in the background most of time. The only mechs who usually talked to him on a regular basis were Bumblebee, Hound, Jazz, and Bluestreak. "Okay, little 'bots. I need to fill the cubes. You sit here and don't move." Gears set Prowl and Red Alert on the bar, keeping an optic on them at all times while he filled the cubes. Prowl and Red Alert remained obediently in their places, too interested in what Gears was doing to try to wander anywhere.

With the rations for Brawn, Huffer, Windcharger, and Cliffjumper served and arranged on a tray, Gears set the tray on the bar. Prowl eyed the tray with interest and got on his hands and knees to crawl to the tray, intending to examine the energon. "Oh no, you won't." Gears picked up the sparkling before he could reach the cubes, bringing Prowl close to his face. "Those are not for sparklings. They'll make you sick."

Prowl frowned cutely for a moment but then tilted his head and patted Gears' face. Gears couldn't help but smile at the sparkling. He really wondered if Bluestreak was nearly this cute as a sparkling. Then, an idea crossed his processor, and Gears set the sparkling back down on the bar. He picked an empty cube and held it in two fingers before the sparklings. "Hey, you two wanna help me hand these out?"

Gears moved the cube around a little and grinned when the sparklings followed the cube with their optics. "All you have to do is hold them out like this to the other bots." The minibot helped to move Red Alert's little hands while he held the empty cube, holding it up to be taken. Prowl immediately caught on – after all, he had handed Jazz a 'nakin' – and quickly grabbed one of the full cubes in his unsteady hands, miraculously keeping it from spilling while he offered it to Gears. "Yeah, just like that, Prowl." Gears grinned and took the cube, setting it back down on the tray. "But you gotta wait until the 'bots are here."

As if they had been summoned, Brawn, Cliffjumper, Windcharger, and Huffer came into the room, talking among themselves. Red Alert chirped loudly and excitedly, bouncing a little in his seat and waving to the new arrivals.

"Hey, there, Red. Hiya, Prowl." Windcharger smiled to the sparklings.

"Chaja!" Prowl said excitedly while Red Alert grabbed one of the cubes and held it up for the gray and red minibot though he spilled a little on the tray as he did.

"That's me," Windcharger murmured with fond amusement and caught the cube before Red Alert could drop it. "Thank you!"

Red Alert clicked happily and reached for another cube which he offered to Huffer although, this time, he received no thanks which made the baby Lamborghini pout. Prowl wasn't about to let his friend's efforts go without proper thank you.

"Bad Huffa!"

Huffer choked a little on his energon and looked over his shoulder at the frown Prowl was aiming at him. "Thank you, Red Alert," he mumbled, and with both sparklings satisfied with his thanks, he made his way out of the recreation room.

"Bawn!" Prowl held a cube up for the gruff minibot who smiled at him and nodded, thanking him and Gears for the cube.

"Hey, Gears. Sparkling sitting?" Cliffjumper grinned and watched Prowl struggle to reach the last cube, casually spinning the tray around just a little so the sparkling could take the cube.

"Just for a little. Wheeljack's debriefing the other bots about something."

"Cwiffjumpa!" Prowl held the cube up for the red minibot and Cliffjumper chuckled at Prowl's attempts to pronounce his name.

"Thank you, sprocket!" The red minibot poked Prowl's nose and accepted the cube, swallowing it all in one gulp. "'Kay, gotta get going. See you around, guys!"

Prowl and Red Alert waved clumsily at the departing minibot and turned back to look at Gears expectantly. "Guess we better go back to the pen, huh?" Gears picked up the sparklings and made his way back to the pen where he tried to settle back comfortably against the wall where the other sparklings were still deeply in recharge.

* * *

"Man, it's going to feel so odd to have them back to be grown mechs," Bluestreak said as he walked down the halls with Jazz, Hound, and Ironhide.

"Enjoy him for the last forty eight hours, Blue." Jazz chuckled. Wheeljack explained to them the machinery needed to return the sparklings back to normal required forty eight hours to charge properly. Just two more earth days, and Prowl would be back to normal, and neither Jazz nor Ironhide would have to put up with the Behemoth of a working schedule he endured. Ironhide definitely had a newly acquired respect for Prowl's ability to keep up with all that work by himself.

"At least Sunny won't be trying to hit Wheelj--" Bluestreak stopped abruptly in mid-sentence, staring in wonder at the scene displayed before his optics.

Lightly in recharge, Gears was leaning against the wall of the play pen, Sideswipe, Mirage, and Perceptor cuddled against his leg, Red Alert was sprawled over Gear's middle and Prowl was crawling around the pen with the other sparklings' blanket over him.

Jazz grinned widely, and with light steps headed to the pen, he picked up his stuck-as-sparkling mate, removing the blanked in the process. "Havin' fun, Prowler?"

"Jass!" Prowl patted Jazz's face, then turned to look back at the recharging Gears, "Gurrs?"

"That's kinda cute," Ironhide chuckled softly and carefully picked up Perceptor, making sure not to disturb his rest. Hound did the same with Mirage, and so did Bluestreak with Sideswipe.

Moving the red twin to rest against his shoulder, Bluestreak shook Gears gently. "Hey, Gears."

The minibot's optics flickered on and off for a moment before they came fully online. "Huh?" He looked around, disoriented for a moment, then sat up, remembering what he was supposed to be doing. "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to go offline."

"It's alright, it's pretty early anyway," Bluestreak murmured with a smile, reaching up for Red Alert. "Thank you for watching over them, Gears."

Gears nodded and smiled the tiniest smile, "Anything for you, Bluestreak."

"Yes, thank you!" Jazz pipped in. "Say bye to Gears. Prowler, gotta go back ta do your work." Jazz grinned and nuzzled his baby Datsun when Prowl waved good bye to the minibot. The other mechs thanked Gears as well and left.

Gears watched Bluestreak leave the room with the sparklings in his arms. "Anything for you..." he whispered softly.


	20. Hound Trekker

Title: Honey, Prime, I shrunk the Kids Officers

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Capter 19 – Hound Trekker.  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: : Hound sparkling sits.

* * *

"Where is Mirage?" Hound asked and shielded his optics with his hand, prompting a smile to spread on the baby Ligier's face plates. "I wonder, oh, I wonder where Mirage could be?"

Mirage clicked happily, clapping his little hands with glee while Hound called for him, pretending he couldn't see him. The sparkling clapped louder and squealed, making cute and excited clicking sounds at Hound, trying to coerce him into 'finding' him.

"Where are you, Mirage?" Hound turned his face to look somewhere other than where the sparkling was sitting on their berth. "Maybe you are behind the desk?" The scout made a move for the desk, but Mirage began to chirp loudly, trying to direct him somewhere else. "Or maybe you're by the table." Hound turned around to head for the small table on the far end of the room where Mirage, as an adult mech, enjoyed to sit down to read.

The sparkling Mirage chirped again, a little more exasperated this time and began to click in annoyance, trying to direct Hound to where he was. Hound chuckled softly and turned around, feigning to be blindly following his stuck-as-sparkling mate's trail. "Darling Mirage, where are you?"

Mirage chirped louder in what Hound assumed was the baby Ligier's way to say 'I'm here!' and reached his little arms out, tiny fingers curling and uncurling, beckoning him closer. "I think," the green mech trailed, coming closer to the berth and still pretending he couldn't see the sparkling. "I think my beloved Mirage is somewhere around here."

As Hound's face drew closer, Mirage stood on his wobbly legs and all but pounced on the other mech's face, wrapping his arms around it and holding as tight as his diminutive limbs and hands would let him. Mirage chirped with glee, happy to have caught the scout. "Ah! There you are!" Hound grinned and picked up his sparkling, nuzzling him lovingly and tickling the little depression on Mirage's neck emblazoned with a red 'T', a place that was very sensitive on the adult Ligier and ungodly ticklish on the sparkling Mirage.

"Well, what do you say we go out for a little? I kind of need to go for a stroll." The tracker fixed his hold on his sparkling, picked up a couple of toys Mirage favored, and left the room. On his way out, Hound passed by Jazz who seemed pretty distraught. "Hey, Jazz. You're okay?"

"Hello, Hound. Hey, Mirage," Jazz said softly, managing a little smile for the sparkling before he looked back at Hound. "Not really, I gotta handle an emergency, an' Blue's only Primus knows where. I got no one ta look after Prowl, an' I can't take him."

"Is Prime busy?" Hound cast a quick glance to the baby Datsun in Jazz's arms and found that Prowl seemed almost as distraught as Jazz himself, if not more. His door wings were constantly drooping then flaring up in that 'menacing' way of his, his tiny fingers clutching Jazz's arms as tightly he could.

"He left for a meetin' with some humans early in th'mornin', an' unfortunately, the emergency involves Ratchet an' Ironhide, so neither can take care of Prowl." The saboteur shifted his weight from one foot to the other, growing restless as his distress intensified.

"If you leave me his energon just in case, I can look after him until you're back." Hound offered and fixed his hold on Mirage, freeing an arm to accommodate Prowl.

"Thank you!" Jazz's expression immediately turned to one of absolute relief and thankfulness towards the green scout. "I owe ya a big one, Hound!"

"It's no problem, Jazz. I'm glad to help." Hound smiled down at Prowl who seemed to relax as soon as Jazz did. The Porsche carefully handed the baby Datsun and his energon to the Jeep and kissed his sparkling's little nose.

"Gotta go for a bit, Prowler, but I won't be gone long, okay? You be good with Hound and Mirage." Jazz smiled when Prowl made a smacking sound against his chin's plating, like Perceptor had done with Megatron. "Love ya, too, Prowler." Jazz grinned and petted the sparkling's helm, then turned around and left to handle the emergency.

Hound grinned fondly as Prowl waved to the retreating Porsche, and Mirage saw fit to imitate the sparkling and wave to Jazz. "All right, boys, let's go out!"

Hound carried the sparklings around the volcano where the Ark was partly buried, looking for a good spot with comfortable shade since he knew Mirage despised to be exposed to the harsh sun for more than a few breems. Once he found a spot that pleased him, Hound sat Prowl on a rock, instructing him to stay still for a few moments while he pulled a large blanket out from a compartment in his left leg and laid the blanket down on the ground. The scout set Mirage down on the blanket then picked up Prowl to set him down next to Mirage. The baby Ligier reached happily for one of his favorite toys and began to play around with it. Prowl was offered a couple of cubes to play with, but the baby Datsun decided he'd rather chew on them instead.

For about an hour, Hound watched the sparklings play and was surprised to watch Mirage and Prowl chase after each other around the blanket, trying to borrow each other's toys. Mirage had the advantage of being able to walk, but Prowl balanced his lack of glorious baby steps with quick reflexes and clung to Mirage's legs to prompt him to fall onto his aft. When both sparklings grew bored of their little game, Prowl decided a nap was in order, and he curled up on the blanket, falling quickly into a light recharge.

Mirage, however, was everything but tired and determined the best source of fun around the barren land was Hound. The Jeep laughed softly and allowed Mirage to go around poking and prodding him anywhere he could reach. When he grew tired of Hound's legs, Mirage decided it was time to climb the 'Scout Mountain' and tried his best to climb up to the green mech's chest. The action proved difficult when Mirage wasn't able to reach up to his bumper, let alone pull himself up on it.

Hound took pity on the baby Ligier and moved his arms to rest in a position that would allow Mirage to use them for leverage. Mirage caught up quickly enough and began to try to crawl his way up over Hound's arm and then to his chest plating where he poked, prodded, and played with his pulley system, then his windshield. Once he got bored with that, he climbed the distance to Hound's head where he sat proudly on top of Hound's helm, clapping his hands and chirping loudly.

The scout chuckled softly and kept his hands close to his head to hold onto the sparkling just in case. "Ready to go back to the Ark?" Hound asked when Mirage looked positively bored with his new position, but the sparkling wasn't ready to go back into the Ark just yet.

Hound helped the sparkling down and set him on the ground where the baby spy managed to stand still, looking ready to dash away to explore this barren, rocky place. "Okay, we'll take a walk, just let me get Prowl," Hound said, chuckling softly at the excited clicks and chirps Mirage produced in response.

Prowl woke from his little nap almost as soon as Hound touched him, and he allowed Hound to pick him up while the green mech folded the blanket and put it away on his compartment. With Prowl safely in his arm, Hound took one of Mirage's diminutive hands and allowed the sparkling to lead him around in his exploration. Prowl wiggled in Hound's arms, wanting to be put down so he could explore, too. "Down!"

Knowing the baby tactician couldn't stand up on his own, Hound set Prowl down and helped him to his feet, holding him by his hand, and he pretty much dragged the sparkling around with him and Mirage. Prowl gave little steps, really unbalanced and clumsy since he was being held by his hand rather than clinging to Hound's leg like he'd do with Jazz.

Still, Prowl was happily enjoying the little stroll, being led by Hound who was being led around by Mirage. The scout never thought the sparkling spy could possibly be this adventurous, but he was happy to indulge him even if Prowl was quickly beginning to get tired, trying to keep up with Mirage's trotting.

"Careful there, Mirage. We don't want to make Prowl fall, now do we?" Hound grinned down to both sparklings, and Mirage slowed down a little, clicking and chirping happily.

Prowl fluttered his door wings happily in relief now that the pace had slowed down. "Hound!" he said, patting his hand with his free little white hand, then pointed towards the familiar form of a certain saboteur. "Jass!"

"It's what I see." Hound grinned and steered Mirage in Jazz's direction. The baby Ligier clicked and tried to trot faster towards the newcomer. Prowl tried to quicken his pace too, but he wasn't very successful in that endeavor.

Regardless, Jazz grinned and smiled, watching Prowl cling to Hound's leg with his free hand and taking the last steps to him. The scout released his hold on Prowl's hand, and the sparkling tried to walk the insignificant two steps to Jazz, but after he tried to leave the stability offered by Hound's leg, he was pulled back by the weight of his wings and almost fell back, or he would have if Jazz's hands hadn't caught him just in time.

Prowl frowned cutely, and his door wings drooped so much they were almost flat against his back. The baby Datsun whimpered softly as a pout took over his face. Hound mentally winced and was about to cover Mirage's audio sensors, expecting Prowl to burst into a fit of loud, audio-shattering cries. Thankfully, Jazz gathered the sparkling in his arms and began to soothe and comfort the frustrated Prowl.

Mirage clicked sadly and patted Jazz's leg, chirping worriedly and looking up from Jazz to Prowl. "He's all right, 'Raj," Jazz whispered gently to the baby Ligier and stroked his helm's crest gently. "He's just frustrated."

Hound picked up Mirage, nuzzling his stuck-as-sparkling mate gently. Mirage chirped at Prowl, reaching a little black hand to pat his friend's own helm's crest. Prowl's door wings raised up a little again, and he reached to pat Mirage's head, too. Soon enough, Prowl seemed content enough and cuddled against Jazz, his wings fluttering happily as the saboteur tickled the sparkling, plastering little kisses around the baby Datsun's face until the sparkling laughed and squirmed in glee. "Thanks for watchin' him over, Hound."

"It was no problem, Jazz." The scout smiled and stroked Prowl's helm gently before he excused himself and made his way back to his and Mirage's quarters with the sparkling in his arms. "Now that was interesting, don't you think?"

Mirage looked up at Hound and merely wiggled in his arms to get himself comfortable, giving the other mech _the look_. "Yes, yes. I'll give you your energon and then you can have your beauty sleep." Hound chuckled with amusement as Mirage clicked happily and cuddled better against his chest plating, having worn himself out with all that trekking.


	21. Have You Seen Jazz Dressed In Blue?

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: Chapter 20 – Have You Seen Jazz Dressed In Blue?  
Rating: PG-13 Humor.  
Notes: Jazz has a moment of reflection about Prowl.

* * *

Watching the sparkling Prowl recharge had become an activity Jazz actually looked forward to. Even if just for a short nap, watching Prowl, the unflappable, seemingly emotionless, cold and logic tactician recharge with his little aft propped up in the air, with one fist partly disappearing into his mouth, and his door wings flopped at his sides was a treat for the saboteur.

Nobody, not even Jazz, could ever think about Prowl equating to being such cute sparkling, but he was, and Jazz was now actually thankful he had this chance to see what Prowl had been like as a sparkling. The Porsche was going to miss the sight of the baby Datsun curled on the berth, peacefully in recharge, dreaming of only Primus knew what.

It was a bit of a conflictive emotion, Jazz admitted. He missed his Prowl, the adult mech that could be all business and proper in a moment, then a loving, passionate and mischievous mate towards him in the next. But Jazz also fell in love with this side of Prowl he never could begin to picture in his CPU. The Prowl that was a shameless, curious sparkling. There was much of the adult Prowl that he could see in the baby tactician, but completely raw, unobscured by whatever preconceptions or self restrains the adult Datsun set upon himself.

It was a look into Prowl at his very basics, his unadulterated essence, the Prowl that could have been, the Prowl that maybe still was, hidden underneath the layers of protocol and self restrain, of morality or the socially acceptable.

Jazz remembered a saying humans had about children being the brutally honest. They had no self restrains, they said things as they saw them, even if already by then their thoughts and perceptions were already influenced by third parties. The sparkling Prowl was similar in that regard. Prowl without the restrains the adult self consciousness provided. He wasn't malicious, but he didn't have the strong sense of right and wrong. He acted according to what felt right to him, rather than what external influences dictated.

Little, innocent Prowl found nothing wrong in calling Sunstreaker 'Slagger', and found no wrong in berating the mini bots when something they did upset him or his sparkling friends. The adult Prowl would do the same, yes, but with different words, with a different approach. He'd bee-line around the problem, while the sparkling took the direct route.

It was this comparative what made Jazz realize how similar yet so very different Prowl was to the sparkling he once was. At the same time, it helped the Porsche to see how much Prowl had regained of that sparkling since they became mates. Prowl wasn't quite as prude around Jazz, he let himself go more often, and in private, the Datsun denied nothing to him. Jazz smiled sadly, thinking about the napkin the baby tactician gave him when he asked if the sparkling got him a souvenir, then looked over to a rack on the wall above the headrest of their berth, to a record Prowl acquired for him in one of his diplomatic missions. "Ya brought me a souvenir, Prowler?" Jazz asked in jest when Prowl returned from that trip, and much to his surprise, Prowl produced a record of one of Jazz's favorite bands.

The saboteur took a seat on the berth next to the sparkling, careful not to disturb his rest, and allowed himself to remember more fond memories about Prowl, from their first interactions to times when Prowl was there to hold the saboteur close when the weight of the work he did as a special operations agent took a toll on him. To the times they argued and debated, to the apologies and make ups, to the times when they could just spend a few moments together holding each other, when the battles ragged and desperate good bye kisses were exchanged, fearing that could be their last kiss. To the passionate intimacy they shared, the times when Prowl would crack that rare joke, the times when all Prowl would do was to hold his hand in a silent 'I love you'.

Jazz held back a sigh, drawing his knees up to his chest plates, feeling very lonely all of sudden. He wondered if the other 'bots were feeling the same way, if they missed their adult mates as much as he did. In rare moments like these, when Jazz felt so vulnerable, and when the cheerful saboteur was no more, Prowl's arms would wrap around him, holding him close, letting him know through his proximity there was someone there for him. Right now, Jazz wanted so badly to feel Prowl's arms around him.

What he did not expect was to feel arms wrapping, or trying to, around him. Little arms that couldn't even fully encircle Jazz's relatively slim waist, but that still tried nonetheless. Jazz looked down to see the sparkling Prowl looking up to him with big blue optics full of concern, supporting half of his weight against Jazz's hip while his little arms encircled his middle.

"Jass 'kay?" Prowl asked and his door wings drooped visibly, sensing, perhaps through their bond, that Jazz was not feeling well. The Porsche smiled sadly and reached to stroke the sparkling's cheek. "I'm okay, I just miss Prowl, that's all."

Jazz realized a little too late that he iwas/i talking with Prowl, and the sparkling tilted his head with a cute, absolutely confused expression.

"Powl?" the baby Datsun asked, pointing to himself.

"I mean the adult Prowl," Prowl frowned cutely again. Who was this other Prowl 'Jass' was talking about? "Powl?" the sparkling asked again, pointing to himself.

Jazz couldn't help but chuckle softly and pick the sparkling, "Yes, yer Prowl, too. Ya just need ta grow up a little so I can smooch ya properly." Jazz grinned and stroked a finger under the sparkling's nose, prompting Prowl to try to bat his hand away because it tickled. The saboteur laughed and hugged the sparkling close, nuzzling his cheek. "Ya are so cute, Prowler. Makin' it hard not t'want a sparklin' of our own when yer back to normal."

Prowl's door wings fluttered and he patted Jazz's face in that way the Porsche learned was Prowl's way to say 'yeah, you do that'. Jazz laughed again and caught the sparkling's tiny fingers on his mouth, nibbling playfully, feeling all his gloomy mood washed away by Prowl's innocent displays of affection and care. Even as a sparkling he had that effect on Jazz.

Prowl squealed and pulled his hand back, reaching for Jazz's face with his little hands, he opened his mouth and leaned forward, capturing the saboteur's nose. "Hey!" Jazz pulled Prowl away a little to keep his nose away from the sparkling. "Ya ain't goin' to be happy till you've put the whole contents o' the Ark in your mouth, are ya?"

Prowl merely tilted his head and proceeded to shove his own hand into his mouth, as if to prove Jazz's point.

"A mech can't stay blue for long with ya 'round, ya know?"

"Bwu?" Prowl released his own fist and tilted his head, wondering why Jazz would be blue. "Bwu?" Prowl pointed to the thicker blue racing stripe on the saboteur's chest plates.

"It's an expression, Prowler," Jazz murmured affectionately, pressing a kiss to the golden crest on the sparkling's helm. "Jus' means I'm okay now."

Prowl's door wings rose a little and fluttered again. "Jass 'kay!" He threw his little arms up in the air, bringing a wide grin to the Porsche's lip components.

"Yep, let's get ya cleaned, some energon an' then some much needed rest. I swear to Primus I don't know how can ya handle all that behemoth of a work load." Jazz took the sparkling to their private wash rack.

When both Jazz and Prowl were washed, dried and fueled, Jazz laid on the berth with the sparkling nestled against his chest. Prowl curled up against Jazz, quickly falling into recharge, bringing his little fist to his mouth again as he slept. Jazz watched him recharge for a while, he was going to miss the sparkling, but he was also happy to know soon enough his mate would be back with him, and the innocent love shinning in his baby Datsun's optics would be matched by the tender love sparking on his tactician's optics.

And maybe, just maybe, conflict permitting, one day they could form a family of their own. With those hopeful thoughts, Jazz allowed himself to recharge, holding the sparkling Prowl close to his chest.


	22. Sparks Dream Inside Pt 1

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 21 – Sparks Dream Inside. Pt 1  
Rating: PG-13 Humor/Angst.  
Notes: Some sparklings return to normal.

* * *

The morning broke into an Ark filled with expectation. Wheeljack performed the last minute check ups on his equipment while a large group of mechs stood around in his lab, some merely satisfying their curiosity about the important event about to take place, while others carried the participants.

Mirage looked around without much interest, not particularly happy about being awoken so early. Perceptor, however, was fully awake and watching what Wheeljack was doing with interest, his blue optics gleaming with curiosity while his little fingers curled around Ironhide's hand and arm.

Sideswipe was curled against Sunstreaker's chest, enjoying the warmth of his brother's chassis and seemingly undecided whether he wanted to go back to recharge or wake up, perking up every now and then only to lean back against Sunstreaker with apparent intent to return to his slumber.

Red Alert was fully awake as well, happily playing with Inferno's fingers completely oblivious to whatever was going on in the room. Prowl was frowning, glaring at the large tanks Wheeljack was tuning, something was going to happen that involved those tanks and the baby Datsun didn't like it.

"All right, they're ready." Wheeljack announced while Ratchet nodded, giving his approval of the safety of the invention. The room filled with excited whispers, everyone wondering what would happen.

Sunstreaker was quick to bring his sparkling twin to the tanks, setting the sparkling on his feet to lean against the bottom wall of the tank. Sideswipe chirped worriedly when he was left inside the tank and a glass cover fell over the entrance, locking Sunstreaker outside. "It'll be all right, bro." Sunstreaker murmured comfortingly, pressing a hand against the glass and smiling a little for his brother, calming down the sparkling enough so the little one wouldn't cry.

Hound and Inferno did the same, setting down their respective sparklings in the tanks. Red Alert seemed to panic a little as well, but Inferno stayed close to reassure the baby Lamborghini, while Mirage seemed unfazed by what was going on, merely patting the glass as if he were trying to tell Hound he was fine and not to worry.

Perceptor was eager to be put inside his own tank and Ironhide couldn't help but chuckle in amusement at how excited the sparkling was. It was when Jazz began to move towards Prowl's tank than the proverbial hell broke loose.

"Nu!" Prowl shook his head and clung to Jazz with all the strength his little body permitted. "Jass, nu!" the baby Datsun's door wings quivered and fluttered in a stressed manner.

"Prowl, baby, it's gonna be fine," Jazz tried to soothe the sparkling, stroking the back of his helm but the sparkling's whimpers and pleas did not cease.

"Nu!" Prowl shook his head, looking up at Jazz with blue optics that screamed he didn't want to be put in that machine. "Please, baby," Jazz murmured, pressing kiss to the golden crest of his sparkling's helm. Prowl shook his head again, his whimpers grew louder and he began to wriggle and struggle in the Porsche's arms, trying to break free and get away from that machine.

Jazz held the sparkling as tight as he dared without risking to hurt him and brought the crying Prowl's head against his shoulder, pressing his cheek against the baby tactician's helm, whispering non-sense to him to try to calm him down, until Jazz couldn't stand it anymore and turned around to leave.

"Jazz?" Wheeljack asked, stopping the saboteur's retreat.

"Can't do this ta him, 'Jack." the Porsche didn't turn around to face the engineer and the other mechs already waiting by the machine. "Ya can turn the others back t'normal without him, right?"

"Well, yes but--"

"Do it then." Jazz said nothing more, ignoring Ironhide's calls and even Bluestreak asking if he didn't want Prowl to be back to normal. The gunner had no idea how much that question stung, but Jazz couldn't hold it against the younger mech. He did want Prowl to be back to normal, but he couldn't stand to see the sparkling terrified like this. He didn't want to force him into something that scared Prowl to the point of even wanting to break away from him to avoid it.

Prowl's cries subsided more and more the farther away they moved from the lab, and the sparkling calmed down once Jazz brought him to the security room to oversee the procedure through the monitors. Prowl rubbed his face tiredly, obviously exhausted from his tantrum but stubbornly refused to recharge. "Don't worry, baby, I ain't goin' t'take ya back there."

Jazz smiled a little to his sparkling, brushing his thumbs tenderly along Prowl's cheek plating. "C'mon, baby, get some sleep." Prowl frowned a little but curled up against the Porsche's chest, falling into recharge shortly afterwards. Jazz's smile faded and he turned to look at the monitors, watching the process taking place.

---------------------

"Let's do this, shall we?" Wheeljack rubbed the back of his neck, feeling a little unsure now that Prowl was taken away. The other mechs nodded, and it was easy to see everyone was shaken by the unexpected turn of events.

Wheeljack activated the device and urged everyone to stand back as far as possible before joining them as the machine began to hum and glow, and some sort of gas began to fill the occupied tanks. For a couple of minutes, which felt like hours to all present, the only audible sounds came from the hum of the machinery and the shifting of parts inside the tanks until all sounds faded and the machinery stopped glowing.

"Well?" Sunstreaker asked, nudging Wheeljack with his elbow.

Wheeljack approached the tanks and released the locks of the tanks, a cloud of gas escaped from inside and after a moment a familiar voice groaned, prompting Inferno to rush towards Red Alert's tank. "Red!" Before Red Alert knew what was going on he found himself pulled against the fire engine's chest and promptly and thoroughly kissed, whatever initial protest the Lamborghini could have had was promptly melted away by the relief and desperation of Inferno's kiss.

Hound was able to contain himself a little more than Inferno and waited until Mirage came out of the tank on his own, pulling the other mech into a tight hug. Mirage gasped in surprise but once he found himself in the scout's embrace and heard him murmur "Primus, I missed you." the spy threw away any inhibitions he had and wrapped his arms around his mate, nuzzling Hound's head as if to reassure the other he was there and was fine.

Sunstreaker approached his brother and Sideswipe gave him an odd look. "If you hug me or kiss me, I'll scream and be traumatized for life."

The golden Lamborghini stopped cold on his tracks for a moment, gaping mouth showing his surprise and shock before his expression turned into a snarl. "Frag you, you jerk!" and with that he bonked his brother on the back of his head, pulling Sideswipe into a hug while his twin laughed, returning the embrace. "Yeah, love you too, sunshine."

Ratchet and Ironhide helped Perceptor out of the tank, steadying the seemingly dizzy scientist. "Yer okay, Perceptor?" Ironhide asked as they held the other mech, and the red van couldn't help but feel there was some sort of paternal concern in his voice, after all the mech had virtually become his and Ratchet's baby for the time he had been stuck as a sparkling.

"I believe so," Perceptor answered and rubbed his head, feeling still a little unsteady and gratefully allowing the two older mechs to steady him and hold some of his weight. "What happened?"

Ratchet frowned and looked over at Wheeljack. "I think they don't remember."

"Remember what?" Red Alert asked absently, having managed to pry himself away from Inferno's kiss. "Did something happen to us?"

Even with his face mask everyone could tell Wheeljack was wincing. "It's a long story. I think we better go some place a little less crowded to explain to you guys."

------------------

Hours passed by and the involved mechs were updated about the situation, and their regression to sparklings, although some details were skipped for the time being, they were all told Prowl was still a sparkling, having refused to go into his tank.

Wheeljack didn't say it out loud but the other four mechs apparent lack of memories regarding their time as sparklings clued him to the reason why Prowl could have refused the process.

He wasn't certain, and all he had was a rather wild supposition about Prowl sensing if he went into that tank, he would be gone. In a simple sparkling logic, Prowl could have assumed the tank to be akin to a death sentence --The sparkling did not want to 'die'.

And in essence that was more or less what happened. All apparent traces of their second sparklinghood had disappeared from Mirage's, Red Alert's, Perceptor's an Sideswipe's memories. It was as if the sparklings and their interaction with the rest of the Ark crew had never occurred in the first place.

Wheeljack didn't voice his thoughts to anyone, as he had no way of knowing if he was right or if he was just over thinking possible reasons for Prowl's refusal to accept the process and be turned back into their Second in Command.

After Jazz's shift ended, he accepted to let the now adult mechs see Prowl to prove the event actually took place. Prowl was fully awake when that happened and his confusion upon seeing his friends suddenly as big and developed as all the other mechs around him was easy to see on his face plates.

"Woah, it iis/i Prowl!" Sideswipe couldn't hold that comment in, reaching with a finger to touch the sparkling as if he was some novelty toy he just had to touch to make sure was real. Prowl didn't like to be prodded like that by the red Lamborghini and frowned cutely, batting away the other's hand. "Bad Siders!"

"Primus!" Red Alert gasped, trying to make sense of what he was seeing.

"Prowl's so... so cute." Sideswipe said with a mixture of disbelief and mild horror. Prowl should not be cute, especially not when he was frowning at him with a diminutive version of that stern look he addressed at him while giving him a dressing down for his most recent mischief.

Jazz smiled a little, and Mirage was quick to notice the sadness barely concealed behind it. "Jazz?" Mirage asked softly and frowned when the saboteur looked up at him, the sadness behind his smile all the more visible now. "Yeah?"

"You're going to be fine, Jazz?" Hound asked.

"I..." Jazz's smile faded a little and he shook his head. "I don't know, guys."

"Jass 'kay?" Prowl looked up to the saboteur, patting his face with his little hand. Jazz forced the smile back to his lip components and nodded, kissing Prowl's helm lovingly. "Yeah, I'm fine, Prowler."

Prowl frowned deeply, picking on the adult mech's lie right away but curled against Jazz's chest, bringing a little white fist to his mouth to suckle on, looking as if the sparkling was deep in thought and absolutely adorable while doing so.

"If you need anything--"

"Right now I'd like t'take Prowl back ta our room to give him his energon. It's been a long day." Jazz cut Mirage's words, though he bowed his head apologetically.

"All right, everyone scram." Ironhide began to push mechs out of the way to let Jazz and his sparkling out of the room, Hound and Mirage following after him.

On the way to his and Prowl's quarters, the Ligier couldn't help himself and wrapped an arm around Jazz's shoulders whole Hound did the same from the other side. The Porsche murmured a 'thank you' to his friends and allowed them to take him back to his room, accepting the silent support the couple offered him. They knew this was becoming too much for Jazz to bear, to see all the other mechs reunited with their mates, friends and family, while his bonded was a baby curled quietly in his arms.

Jazz entered the code to their room and allowed the scout and spy inside, if only to reassure them he'd be all right for the night.

"Jazz?" Mirage asked again, watching Jazz sit down on the large berth he shared with Prowl, holding the sparkling close as he pulled a ration of special energon out of subspace to feed him.

"I miss him very much." Jazz admitted, knowing very well what Mirage wanted to ask. "But I ain't forcing him t'do somethin' he doesn't want to do."

Hound moved closer and reached to take Prowl from Jazz's hold. "I'll feed him." Prowl looked from Hound to Jazz then back to Hound, reaching his little arms up to let the scout pick him. Jazz offered him the cube and the little tool he used to feed the sparkling, and the Jeep sat on the nearby desk while he fed the baby Datsun.

"How do you know he doesn't want to do it?" Mirage sat down next to his superior and friend, "He's a sparkling."

Jazz shook his head. "Sparklin' he might be, 'Raj, but he knows what he wants. The way he looked at me when I was takin' him ta the tank... it broke my spark right there." Jazz smiled sadly, looking back to the spy. "Can't do that to him."

'iWhat about what you want?/i' Mirage wanted to ask, but decided against it. He looked back to Prowl, wanting to blame him for the pain he knew Jazz was feeling, but he couldn't find it in him to be upset, because it was evident to him Prowl was not happy either. The sparkling was quiet, accepting the energon Hound offered him each time and immediately proceeding to bring his hands to his mouth, his wings were droopy, and his optics while bright, seemed somewhat dull.

"If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask." Mirage said finally, wrapping his arms around his friend.

"We're here if you need us, Jazz." Hound reaffirmed his mate's offer, gently stroking Prowl's back as he fed him.

"Thank you." Jazz nodded and rubbed his face tiredly. "If ya don't mind, guys, I need some rest badly."

Mirage nodded and stood up to allow Jazz to lay down on the berth while Hound brought Prowl to the saboteur. Jazz took the sparkling in his arms and brought him to his chest, nuzzling him lovingly, prompting a soft cooing from the little Datsun. Hound and Mirage bid them a good night and both left the two black and whites alone.

"Jass 'kay?" Prowl asked again once they were left alone. Jazz looked down at Prowl and couldn't bring himself to lie to the sparkling anymore. "No, I'm not. But I'll be with time, baby, don't worry."

Prowl frowned again and patted Jazz's face. "Wuwwaby?"

Jazz chuckled softly and nodded, nuzzling Prowl's face with his cheek. "All right, baby, I'll play yer lullaby." the Porsche searched through his internal music player for a melody he composed for the sparkling which Prowl loved to hear at any random time. Jazz turned the music to a very low setting, allowing the soft lullaby to soothe not only Prowl but himself into a much needed recharge. Prowl fell asleep first, curled against Jazz, one little hand curling around Jazz's neck.

"I miss ya, baby," Jazz murmured softly and kissed Prowl's little nose, allowing the stream of pale pink fluid to flow freely down his face. "I love you."

--------------

"Jass up!" Prowl sat on Jazz's chest patting his chest to wake him up. "Up!"

Jazz groaned and turned his face to the side. "S'too early, Prowler." and it was indeed too early for his shift.

"Jass, up!" Prowl frowned cutely and began to bounce on his rear to try to wake the Porsche. "Up, up!"

"Okay, okay, I'm up," the saboteur caught the sparkling by his middle and began to sit up, rubbing his face plates that still bore the traces of the dried up fluid. "Jeez, when ya want attention ya gotta get it, huh?"

"Weejack!" Prowl pointed towards the door.

Jazz looked at the door with a puzzled look on his face. "Is Wheeljack out there? At this hour?"

Prowl shook his head and pointed to the door again. "Weejack! Weejack!" He wiggled a little, trying to lean closer to the door. The saboteur got up from the berth, and took a quick detour to their private wash rack to clean his face, then headed for the door, finding the corridor empty.

"Weejack!" Prowl tugged on Jazz's arm and pointed in the direction to Wheeljack's lab. "Weejack!"

"Want me to take ya t'Wheeljack?" Jazz scratched his head, at loss of what the sparkling wanted.

"Weejack!" Prowl nodded, patting Jazz's face and fluttering his wings. Jazz chuckled a little but obliged the sparkling and took him to the engineer's lab. "Hey, 'Jack, are ya online?" He knocked the doors gently before it opened.

"Jazz? What's up?" Wheeljack looked up from the table with a dismantled device laying on it.

"Sorry t'bug ya, man, but Prowl wanted me ta bring him to ya." the saboteur nodded towards Prowl who immediately raised his little arms, reaching for Wheeljack.

"Huh?" the engineer took the baby Datsun from Jazz's arms. "What is it, Prowl?" he wasn't expecting much in terms of an answer but was promptly pointed towards the empty tanks laying against one of the walls. Wheeljack turned to look at Jazz.

"Jass 'kay," Prowl tilted his head, bringing a hand to his mouth to suckle on his fingertips a bit while still pointing towards the tank meant for him.

"He won't remember anything, Jazz." Wheeljack warned and glanced over to the Porsche.

"Jass 'kay!" Prowl frowned and pointed again towards the tank. Jazz reached to take Prowl from Wheeljack's arms but the sparkling clung to the engineer instead. "Nu, Jass 'kay!"

"Prowl," Jazz murmured, trying to coerce the sparkling back to him. Sure, he missed the adult Prowl, but he didn't want the sparkling to do what he suspected he wanted to do to make Jazz happy. "Ya don't have ta do this, baby,"

Prowl shook his head, patting Jazz's face, then patted Wheeljack. "Weejack, Der!" he pointed back to the tank and Wheeljack cast another questioning glance at Jazz. Jazz nodded slowly, smiling sadly once again, this time, because he knew it would be the last time he would see the sparkling. "He wants to do it, 'Jack."

"All right then." Wheeljack nodded and carried the sparkling to the tank, half way to the tank, Prowl turned in Wheeljack's arm to look back at Jazz and waved his little hand clumsily. "Bai-bai!"

Jazz shook his head, and followed after Wheeljack, helping to set Prowl against the tank that had been fitted to help him stand up. "No, baby, not bye. It's just a see ya, soon."

Prowl tilted his head curiously but remained quiet as the cover of his tank closed. Jazz watched the sparkling and rested a hand against the glass of the cover, watching the baby Datsun reach his own little hand to rest it opposite to Jazz's. "Soon." Prowl said before Wheeljack asked Jazz to step back.

"Soon!" Prowl said one last time as the gas began to fill the tank, his bright blue optics being the last thing Jazz could see before the gas engulfed the sparkling.

"I'll see you soon, baby,"


	23. Sparks Dream Inside Pt 2

Title: Prime, I shrunk the Officers!  
Chapter: 21 – Sparks Dream Inside. Pt 2  
Rating: PG-13 Humor/Fluff.  


* * *

Jazz watched the chamber, awaiting anxiously the outcome, whatever it would be. He couldn't help but feel his spark ache both in sadness and joy, with the knowledge he wouldn't see that sparkling again, but knowing Prowl, his Prowl would be back to him.

The process lasted only a few minutes but to Jazz it felt like an eternity had passed until the machinery signaled the success of the procedure, and the cover of the tank retracted, letting out the excess of gas. Jazz couldn't help but wrap an arm around his waist to grip his own hip almost tight enough to imprint his own fingers into the metal of his hip panel, awaiting.

A soft groan of pain followed by a white hand coming out of the tank, holding onto the opening for support confirmed the procedure succeeded and Prowl made his way out of the tank shakily. "Prowl," Jazz watched his bonded exit the tank, his wings a little droopy and his head hanging, seemingly sore or in pain. The saboteur's processor urged him to act, to do something, to rush to his bondmate, anything. His body, however, refused to move.

"How are you feeling, Prowl?" Wheeljack asked as he hurried to help the mech to steady himself.

"Disoriented." Prowl brought a hand to his helm, powering down his optic as he tried to regain his footing, feeling so weak as if his legs would give in at any moment. "What happened?"

Wheeljack turned sad and worried optics towards Jazz, able to see the fine tremors on the black hand that gripped tightly a hip panel. The engineer turned to Prowl, helping him towards Jazz. "It's a long story. We'll go about that later when you're feeling better, for now you may want to go back to your quarters to recover."

Jazz willed his body to move, finally taking the remaining steps to Prowl and helping Wheeljack to guide the mech out of his lab. Jazz did not speak a word as Prowl was led to their shared quarters. He knew the implicit expectation that was laid on him to explain the events to Prowl, and he couldn't help but feel apprehension about breaching the subject with his bondmate. Jazz really didn't want to have to remind himself once more about the memorable time he had with the sparkling Prowl.

They reached Prowl's and Jazz's quarters and Prowl thanked Wheeljack before tactician and saboteur entered the room. Jazz helped his bondmate to their berth, sitting on the edge of the recharging platform as Prowl made himself comfortable, a hand covering his optics and a faint grimace still twisted his face plates. "Ya need anythin'?" Jazz asked, stroking a hand soothingly along one Prowl's arm that lay slack at Prow's side.

"I'll be fine," Prowl reassured him, his white hand searching Jazz's to hold and squeeze it gently. Jazz pushed aside his sadness, bringing Prowl's hand to his face, nuzzling his cheek against the white hand, relishing on the feeling of his bonded being back, feeling his full presence within their bond.

"You're upset." Prowl's words startled Jazz who turned to look at the prone mech. Prowl was no longer covering his optics, instead looking at him with worried blue optics.

"S'nothin'." Jazz powered down his optics and nuzzled against Prowl's hand. He had missed his lover's touch, having gone without a loving caress for too long for his taste.

"It wasn't my intention to upset you," Prowl murmured, brushing the back of his hand against Jazz. "I'm sorry."

"Prowl?"

"I know, Jazz." Prowl explained, slowly sitting up. "I don't remember everything, but I do have some memories. I remember last night, I remember the fear of not existing anymore, of being forgotten... of forgetting."

Jazz couldn't fight back the emotion welling within his being any more. He threw his arms around Prowl, holding his mate tightly, wanting to protect him, protect that part of Prowl that had been a little sparkling and bask at the same time in the comfort and strength the adult Prowl offered in return. "I didn't know what ta do." Jazz's voice was soft, weak even. "I wanted ya back, but I didn't want ta force ya into somethin' ya didn't want."

"Shh," Prowl hushed his mate, holding him tightly, trying to offer the mech he loved as much comfort and reassurance as he could. "It's fine, Jazz. I'm fine. I remember." They held each other tightly for a long while, neither speaking a word until Jazz finally pulled away, asking Prowl what he could remember. Prowl shared what memories he had, mainly of moments involving Jazz, but a few of his more humorous antics had been preserved in his CPU, like his penchant to call Sunstreaker 'slagger', or his stunt with the Decepticons. Jazz couldn't help but comment about Prowl and his tendency to put anything he could come across into his mouth, specially the saboteur's finger.

They talked for as long as they could until Jazz's internal clock announced he had duty to attend to. Prowl insisted in re-taking his duties immediately, but Jazz refused and coaxed his bondmate into getting some recharge, promising to be back soon and taking care of informing Prime of his recovery.

----------------------

Things fell back into place in the Ark for the most part. Prowl had kept his memories of his time as a sparkling a secret from the rest of the Autobots with the exceptions of Jazz and Ratchet. Prowl took a secret pleasure whenever he had apparent 'slips' and called Sunstreaker slagger, only to deny he had done such a thing moments later, even when he did it before a room full of mechs. Of course, Jazz and Ratchet had the most fun with those occurrences.

Wheeljack had been instructed to dismantle the device and dispose of it in its entirety, they didn't want to risk any more incidents. Wheeljack, though, wasn't sure how to explain the high command his device had mysteriously disappeared, despite confirmation from Red Alert and different security devices that Soundwave's cassettes had not sneaked into the Ark recently. He was about to panic and ready to report the missing device when Blaster calmly informed him he didn't have to worry because he had that covered already. Wheeljack wasn't sure he wanted to know what Blaster was up to, but decided against asking questions, he trusted the communications officer to handle the device with care.

There was, however, something that seemed to enshroud the return to normality (or as normal as the Ark could ever come close to be), and Prowl was well aware that Jazz still missed that caretaker role he had been forced to take when Prowl was transformed into a sparkling. The tactician didn't take long to figure out exactly what saddened Jazz and decided to breach the subject on a clear night when they returned from their respective shifts.

"I know what you want," Prowl spoke and wrapped his arms around Jazz, pulling his bonded against him while he quieted any questions or protests Jazz could harbor with a sound kiss. "I know what your spark desires, because it echoes in mine. I know what you long for, and I promise once this conflict is over, we'll try."

"Prowl," Jazz didn't need Prowl to state exactly what he was talking about, understanding right away what his mate was offering him. "You really want one, too?"

Prowl tugged on Jazz's hand, interlacing his fingers with the saboteur's. "There's no other mech in the universe I'd want to have this with."

Jazz didn't protest or questioned his mate as he was led out of their quarters, down the halls to the Ark's entrance. The visored mech caught a glimpse of the clear night skies above the Ark, the stars twinkled brightly and Jazz couldn't help but think about them as the skies smiling down on them and their hopes for the future. Jazz felt Prowl tug his hand hard enough to have him stumble against the tactician. Prowl brought his lips to Jazz's audio, "Race you."

Without another word Prowl pulled away, smiling at his bonded as he turned and ran away, Jazz laughed and followed after Prowl, both jumping into the air and transforming mid jump, bouncing on their suspension as their tires screeched and their race began. Prowl drove fast through the terrain, far away from humans and any speed regulations that would hinder them, driving as fast as he could with Jazz in tow. They flashed their headlights and brake lights at each other, slowing down and accelerating, swerving around each other, gaining and conceding he top position as they drove under the night sky. Their mutual joy spreading through their bond as they drove through the desert lands surrounding their home.

Neither cared to win the race, knowing that in the end, both would be winners in their own way. Taking the race for what it was, a moment together, where everything that once troubled them was left behind, crossing the arid terrain as they flirted with one another, played with each other. Both sharing a mutual promise that some day, there would be a third racing between them. Some day their sparks' dream would become a reality.


End file.
